"The French version of The Strangers, and Stephen Sommers murdering more of our fond childhood memories..."
The Hidden Gem:
The Master says:
The French strike again, this time with their own version of
The Strangers. The whole concept of mostly-unseen killers terrorizing people who are stuck out in the middle of nowhere is pretty creepy to me, and add to that the identity of these killers (which I won't spoil here),
Ils is a thoroughly unsettling slice of modern Horror cinema. To this day after watching this movie, I do a barrel roll and hide whenever I hear that awful noisemaker-thingy clicking sound. Especially when I'm in
Europe.
The Train Wreck:
The Master says: Maybe it's not a pure Horror movie, but when you shit on the classic
Universal Monsters like this, you must be taken to task by the Horror community.
Dracula,
Frankenstein,
The Wolfman... they aren't characters, they're institutions, and you don't
CGI them up and dumb them down like this! After watching this,
The Mummy movies, and the recent abomination that was
G.I. Joe, it's more than clear that
Stephen Sommers should never be allowed to make anything other than crappy kids movies ever again. Sorry
Hugh Jackman, you're cool and all, and we know
Kate Beckinsale is always smoking hot, but sitting through this movie is about as fun as giving your Grandmother a back rub... with your face, minus the smell of
Vick's Vaporub and decay."
The Master says: The French strike again, this time with their own version of The Strangers. The whole concept of mostly-unseen killers terrorizing people who are stuck out in the middle of nowhere is pretty creepy to me, and add to that the identity of these killers (which I won't spoil here), Ils is a thoroughly unsettling slice of modern Horror cinema. To this day after watching this movie, I do a barrel roll and hide whenever I hear that awful noisemaker-thingy clicking sound. Especially when I'm in Europe. 
The Master says: Maybe it's not a pure Horror movie, but when you shit on the classic Universal Monsters like this, you must be taken to task by the Horror community. Dracula, Frankenstein, The Wolfman... they aren't characters, they're institutions, and you don't CGI them up and dumb them down like this! After watching this, The Mummy movies, and the recent abomination that was G.I. Joe, it's more than clear that Stephen Sommers should never be allowed to make anything other than crappy kids movies ever again. Sorry Hugh Jackman, you're cool and all, and we know Kate Beckinsale is always smoking hot, but sitting through this movie is about as fun as giving your Grandmother a back rub... with your face, minus the smell of Vick's Vaporub and decay."
Sorry for the stupid detail, but I think "The Strangers" is more a american version of "Them" than the other way around...
ReplyDeleteBy the way, your blog is one of my favorite amongst all blogs about horror movies...
ReplyDeleteYou're totally right Alex, but seeing as how The Strangers was a more widely known film (at least here in the US), I made the correlation that way for "ease of use."
ReplyDeleteAnd thanks for the kind words too :)You are now one of our favorites amongst anyone named Alex!
I loved Them. Very intense film that caught me off guard.
ReplyDeleteFrench are killing it last few years with "extreme horror." Ils wasn't my favorite but it was quite unsettling.
ReplyDeleteI totally disagree with your trolling of Van Helsing. It may not have the best of scenarios, trying to include so many classical horror figures, but the monsters were simply outstanding, especially the werewolves, we have yet to see a more imposing, visually impressive werewolf to date. This film was enjoyable due to the well made action scenes and the impressive cgi monsters, which any true monster fan would approve. If you 're allergic to cgi, I suggest you quit reviewing modern films and go see some ancient black n' white werewolf movie with hairy costumes and ape like masks..
ReplyDeleteNo one here trolled anything. you might not understand what trolling is. It's impossible to troll our own site, by definition.
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, no one here hates CGI. We love it. What we hate is CGI being used poorly, in sub-par movies, like Van Helsing.
And no on "we have yet to see a more imposing, visually impressive werewolf to date." Dog Soldiers and The Howling own that title.
This movie was universally panned for a reason, and the reason is because it's not that good. Unless you like cartoonish goofiness in your horror movies, then it's pretty awesome.
The Monster Squad used the classic Universal Monsters to better effect.