VOD Review: Raw (2017)

"Shocking, but not as much as you'd think."

When Raw made its run of the festival circuit last year, there were reports of audience members passing out, throwing up, and fleeing from theaters in a panic. Those reports, coupled with the movie's subject matter, naturally had us expecting a disgusting gore-fest that would leave us retching.

Unfortunately, Raw never quite gets to that level, and that's fine, but it certainly could have used a bit more of a nasty punch. It's still a great film, and it's definitely disturbing, but it left us a bit underwhelmed in that respect.

Justine is a 16-year-old from a strictly vegetarian family who is about to go away to veterinarian school; French veterinarian school, which means that there's going to be lots of sex, parting, and hazing of the weirdest kind. Her older, rebellious sister, Alexia is already a student there, but that doesn't mean that the hazing will be any easier for Justine, and in fact, it might even be harder.

COLLEGE: THE BEST TIME OF A YOUNG GIRLS LIFE.

After being forced to eat a rabbit kidney, Justine becomes ill, her skin breaks out in a nasty rash, and she begins developing a taste for flesh. At the same time, her sexuality is starting to blossom, so whomever she becomes intimate with is in danger of getting a chunk bitten out of them.

YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO LOOK OUT FOR THE BITERS.

Is Justine becoming a cannibal? Does she just need to get laid? Are veterinarian schools in France really like this? Far be it from us to spoil anything for you here, but as far as that last question goes, we sure hope so, because it looks like a salaciously good time. Minus the blood, of course.

IT AIN'T EASY BEING A TEENAGE CANNIBAL.

Raw is an odd movie, and a disturbing one. It's an allegory for burgeoning sexuality, and making your own way in the world. It's also about how vegetarians can turn into cannibals if they so much as get one taste of meat. Alright, that last one is pure fantasy, but one that the movie uses as its main template, and it's a terrifying one.

This is a gorgeous film, and one that I dare call artistic. Director Julia Ducournau has quite a visual eye, as well as a knack for telling a compelling story, and one that certainly goes to some dark places to say what it needs to say.

Garance Marillier owned the role of Justine. She started off convincingly as a shy, awkward girl who was out of her social depth, and transitioned into a predatory sex kitten with ease. The scene where she's dancing and making out with the mirror gave us chills.

SHE SHOULD HAVE STUCK TO VEGETABLES.

I understand why women get bikini waxes, but after seeing this movie, I'll never understand why they would want to.

SWEET JESUS, NOOOOOO....

Oh yes, this movie has its share of gore and disturbing scenes, chief amongst them, that damn bikini waxing scene...

FRANCE IS WEIRD.

This movie isn't shy about the sexuality either, although it's not as overtly explicit as we expected it to be.

GOUTE L'ARC-EN-CIEL.

Raw is a stylish, visceral, disturbing, thought-provoking movie, although for a cannibal movie that uses teen sexuality to show us how tough it is growing up in this day and age, it didn't really push the envelope to that place where so many other French Horror flicks have gone in recent years.

It's still one to watch though, if you've got the stomach for it.

A

Raw is available now on VOD

Garance Marillier and Ella Rumpf are in this.

Blu-ray Review: Gravy (2015)

"Gravy is the 7th best Horror Comedy of 2015. Maybe 8th."

*There were a handful of movies in 2015 that we wanted to review, but didn't get to, so we're just going to go ahead and give them the Quick Review treatment now. We'll keep it short and sweet.

Gravy reminded us a lot of Would You Rather? or Cheap Thrills in its mechanics. Unlike those two, this one is played primarily for laughs, but that same sort of wickedly fun "playing a deadly game" with a room full of people vibe was definitely present here.

Maybe they'd all make for a fun triple feature or something. 

On Halloween night, a clown, Robin Hood, and a slutty Catwoman take the patrons of a Mexican Cantina hostage, because they're hungry; not for Mexican food, but for human flesh! That's right, the costumed friends are cannibals, and every year they head out to do their own twisted brand of trick 'r treating, which involves eating people, and a lot of pop culture references for some reason.

THERE'S SO MUCH GOING ON IN THIS PICTURE, THAT I'M NOT EVEN SURE WHERE TO START.

With no means of escape, the hostages are forced to play a series of odd games to keep from being eaten. Being that the cannibal crew are basically idiots, they quickly lose control of the situation, and it's not long before everything turns into bloody, wacky mayhem.

That's about it, plot-wise.

THERE ARE EASIER WAYS TO EAT AN APPLE, YOU KNOW.

A fairly decent effort, Gravy was a pretty entertaining watch. It's funny (at times), bloody (especially towards the end), and it had a really fun vibe about it. It's the kind of movie that seems like it was fun to make, for all involved.

The cast is mostly made up of lesser-known, B-grade actors (the most recognizable being Gabourey Sidibe and Sarah Silverman, if that tells you anything), all of whom do a solid job with their roles. As thin as the story is, and as uneventful as the movie was in the second act, it was the cast who livened things up and kept us interested in seeing it through. It was a great ensemble.

Fun Fact: For a minute there, I actually thought that Michael Weston was Charlie Day. Turns out they're pretty similar.

THE NUDE SCENE THAT NEVER WAS...

The movie starts off strong, with an almost sweet scene between Sarah Silverman and Michael Weston's characters, and it ends with some crazy bloody action, but the middle lags a bit, getting more caught up in the comedy aspects of the story, than the Horror. Now, that's not necessarily a bad thing, but it could have used a bit less talking, and a bit more action in the middle third.

It also felt like there was really no overall point to the movie, which didn't help things much either.

AWKWARDLY SWEET.

Gravy is a fun Horror Comedy that works because it goes for broke, and its cast is committed to getting it there. It's not the funniest Horror Comedy that was released in 2015, and it does kind of stagnate and drag in parts, but overall, it was a fun watch.

It's probably worth a rent for most people. 

C+

Gravy is available now on Blu-ray, DVD, and VOD.

The lovely ladies of Gravy.

VOD Review: He Never Died (2015)

From his days as the frontman of Black Flag, to his acting turn on Sons of Anarchy, we've always been big fans of Henry Rollins. Of course a large part of that has to do with the way that his gruff, intense exterior belies his intelligence (because he's wicked smart), but as an entertainer, he's about as enigmatic as it comes.

He's had smaller parts in movies and TV shows for the better part of three decades now, but unless we're mistaken, He Never Died marks his first starring role. From the start, the idea of Henry Rollins headlining a Genre flick like this intrigued the hell out of us, and now having seen it, we can honestly say that it turned out far better than we had hoped it would.

Jack is an odd, stoic, and fairly creepy guy who lives alone in a crappy apartment, spending his days doing nothing more than sleeping, eating at the local diner, and playing bingo with old folks. He has no friends, save for Cara (the hot, kind waitress at his favorite diner), and Jeremy (a med student who regularly delivers odd packages to him), but they're hardly true friends. When his estranged daughter (Andrea) shows up at his door, he even turns her away, because we're pretty sure that he has mental issues.

SHE OBVIOUSLY DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO PLAY BINGO.

He's also prone to bouts of aggression, as evidenced by the way he reacts when local thugs begin to harass him; which is to brutally kill them. Oh, they try to kill him too, but whether they stab him, fill him full of lead, or shoot him in the face with a rocket launcher, Jack never dies. When those very same thugs kidnap his daughter and hurt his friends, Jack begrudgingly sets out to save/avenge them. Kind of.

"DON'T CALL IT A COMEBACK, I'VE BEEN HERE FOR YEARS."

It turns out that Jack has quite an impressive history, which dates back all the way to... well, we're not going to say, because that would ruin the fun reveals in the plot, but suffice it to say that he's really old, he can't die, he won't eat anything that has blood in it, and his name is not really Jack.

Deadpan black humor and excessive violence ensue.

ALRIGHT, SO HE DOES EAT SOME THINGS THAT HAVE BLOOD IN THEM...

A solid revenge thriller that is full of both action and supernatural elements, He Never Died really shines because its funny. Yes, it's full of bloody action, boasts some solid characters brought to life by equally solid actors, and it's interesting as hell overall, but above all else, it's really funny. It's not the What We Do In the Shadows kind of funny, as most of the movie's humor is of the dark and subdued variety, but it kept us smiling the whole way through, and made us laugh out loud often.

This is a really clever and well-written movie overall. If first time writer/director Jason Krawczyk's debut feature is any indication of what he has to offer, well be curious to see what he does next.

ODDEST COUPLE EVER.

It's going to be hard to talk about this movie in detail without ruining its plot twists and reveals, so the best thing that we can say in a non-spoiler kind of way is that we love the character of Jack; his history, his "condition"; the creepy old dude who he keeps seeing throughout the movie; and the mythology of it all. There's a visual cue in the very first scene that may tell us exactly who Jack is, so be on the lookout. It reminded us of the title of an old Poison song. We will hint no more!

We also really liked the ending. Rollins' last line was great.

"ALL OF MY LINES WERE GREAT!"

The movie truly works as well as it does because of Henry Rollins' performance as Jack. He plays things so deadpan and serious, that the movie's humorous bits (of which there are plenty), come off 10 times better than if he had played things for actual laughs. The scene where Cara asks Jack what he does for a living is a perfect example of this; his answer still has us chuckling thinking about it. Rollins may not be the best actor in the world, but he has a way of bringing his intense humanity (at least in part) to his roles, and that's especially true in this one. His character isn't easy to like at all, mainly because he's so emotionally distant, but we couldn't help but like him anyway.

THIS IS ABOUT AS ANTI-HERO AS A CHARACTER GETS.

Jordan Todosey and Kate Greenhouse also did a great job playing the ladies in his life, and especially Kate Greenhouse (she had a bigger and more dynamic role.) We're not very familiar with either of their work, but after seeing this one, we can honestly say that both of the ladies know what they're doing in front of a camera, and they played perfectly off of Rollins' disconnected emptiness here.

The movie also has quite a mean streak about it, with plenty of bloody and overtly-violent moments throughout. Henry Rollins kicks ass exactly how we expected Henry Rollins to kick ass in this one; with a quiet cool ferocity.

YOU DUN KNOCKED ON THE WRONG DOOR, BOYS.

Beware the quiet ones, because they always have creepy secrets. Also, Henry Rollins is the fucking man.

SING IT, HENRY. SING IT.

Funny, violent, and oddly captivating, we were surprised at how much we actually enjoyed He Never Died. Most of that enjoyment surely came from being fans of Henry Rollins, but overall the movie tells an entertaining story which is set in a world filled with compelling characters, so it wasn't just Rollins' presence that made it work. There's been talk of this movie continuing as a TV show, and we would love to see that happen.

Avoid the trailers if you can (because they give a ton away), and give this one a rent.

He Never Died is available now on VOD.

Jordan Todosey and Kate Greenhouse are in this.