October 22, 2013

31 Days of Millennium Hotties- Kate Beckinsale

Kate Beckinsale is one of the absolute sexiest women on the planet. At 40, she's still holding her own against younger actresses, and in most cases, they don't even come close. Don't let her coming in at #11 fool you; she could easily be #1 on any "Hottest" list out there. We just have 10 other genre chicks that we like better, so , 11 isn't all that bad... right?

"I should be number one, mate."
Kate Beckinsale isn't a huge Horror genre staple; she's starred in her share of creepy thrillers and the like, but she's mostly a "mainstream" actress. Her being Selene though, the sexiest, most bad-ass Death Dealer in all of the Underworld universe, is reason enough for genre fans (and especially Fanboys) to consider her one of their own.

Death Dealer, Sex Dealer... she can be both.
The Underworld Series, much like the Resident Evil Series, is an action vehicle for Kate Beckinsale to show off her sexy killing skills, and frequent, melodramatic poses. They're really just as much action flicks as they are Horror movies, but there's enough Vampire on Werewolf action to make them count.

They're fun flicks (if uneven ones), and though they tend to be a bit over the top with their crazy wire-fu antics, we can't help but get excited every time a new installment hits Cinemas.

If Hollywood could figure out a way to have Kate Beckinsale's Selene square off with Milla Jovovich's Alice... I think most Horror Fanboy's heads would explode. Maybe implode. Either way, a crossover event like that would be crazy fun. And crazy, ccrazy sexy.

She was better in Whiteout than Whiteout was in Whiteout.
So why is Kate Beckinsale so awesome? Let's run down some of the reasons:
-Sexy British accent.
-Not a fan of wearing panties.
-Has no issue being naked or scantily clad on film.
-She calls her vagina the "Pharaoh's Tomb."That's not even a joke.
-She actually said these words "I can't do sushi, even. I'd rather eat an actual vagina than that, honestly!"
-She's a bit of a slut, cheating on Underworld co-star and life partner Michael Sheen with her then Underworld director (now husband), whatever his name is.
-She doesn't shy away from genre flicks.

You just sit alone in that creepy Motel and think about how bad you are!
Kate is one of the most iconic Vampires of all time. Sure, it may be because she looks so damn good in her tight, shiny Death Dealer body suit, but hell, who are we to judge?  

Underworld and Vacancy aside, she may have starred in some shit genre flicks (Whiteout, Van Helsing), but again, who are we to judge? She makes an effort, man, and she looks good while doing so!

Like a Dominatrix Boss.
One can only hope that we see more of Kate Beckinsale's hotness in many genre films to come.

Maybe she could star in a movie called Pharaoh's Tomb; the story of a substance abusing, bisexual serial killer who seduces both men and women for the sake of revenge. Revenge for what, you ask? Who cares! As long as it has some naked, sexy, bloody, ass-revealing goodness, the plot is irrelevant. Maybe you could throw in a monkey, or make her a nanny or something, to keep it interesting.

Don't ask us. It's Hollywood's call.


  1. Can you beleive shes 40?? Im 36, so I by no means think shes old, but she puts alot of 21 year old women to shame... I heard shes working on a genre film, sorta semi-horror/thriller film titled Eliza Graves right now... I know its based off of a E.A. Poe story and the first poster Ive seen of it looks interesting... we shall see... Ill watch it simply because shes in it... yeah, its like that... Great Horror Hottie list so far, bro...

  2. You're not wrong, JJ... Kate is definitely #1 material. We're not really "Ranking" thoug, not truly, anyhow.

    And no, I can't believe she's 40 and still looks so amazing. she most likely drinks the blood of virgins to maintain her looks. That's the only explanation I can think of LOL