December 29, 2011

The Horror Hotties of 2011- Part 2

Before we start with the movies, it's time for us to give some love to our favorite Horror movie fixtures: the Hotties.

Sure, some may say they're just window dressing, or pretty faces with dirty bodies, but we say yes, you're absolutely right. Who doesn't love innocent Final Girls with hot asses? Who amongst us can discount a girl with fantastic boobs just because they might suck at acting? And really, don't misguided sluts make the world a better place? Yes. The answer is always yes.

So celebrate with us the nakedness, bad behavior, girl-on-girl kissing, random sex, and dirty whore-like mouths that make our Horror world creepy in a whole different way.

Alexandra Daddario
Eyes or jugs? I dare you to decide which one of them is the more perfect feature on this girl. Her boobs are like 2 massive scoops of dirty vanilla ice cream, and her eyes are crystal clear pools of blue sin. So either way, we win. Bereavement was a great movie all on it's own, but the curvy brunette hotness of Alex D. definitely made it that much better. And yes, we are excited to see Texas Chainsaw 3D next year, just because of her. You just know she'll be running around all sweaty in a dirty wife beater, fighting for her sexy life, and that just can't be a bad thing... even if the thought of a TCM movie in "3D" makes us sad. She goes topless, all is forgiven.

Our Review of Bereavement.
Her Horror Hottie Post 1, Post 2.

Amber Marie Bollinger
We're not completely sure, but we think she just dropped the "Amber" from her name, as her IMDB page just say Marie now. Hmm... Until this mystery is cleared up, we will call her The Bollinger Girl. It's just what we have to do. Anywho, just look at her face. Just look for a minute. Eyes, piercing. Nose, cute. Lips, full and wet (?). She's even got a cleft in the chin. She's got that perfect kind of face that makes her able to rock the short haircut, and that's not easy to pull off for a lot of women. Still though there's something else on that face that is better than everything else... she has a cleft in her lip! We'd run backwards through a field of dicks with a greased ass for one kiss from those lips. Not even a dirty one. Just a peck. Lip cleft, okay? Lip cleft.

She's definitely a Horror girl too, which is the best part. Pelt, Hell-O-Ween, Panman... all low-budget, but one of these days she's going to get scooped up for a bigger budget flick and all hell's gonna break loose. Remember that I said it here first.

Our Review of Pelt.
Her Horror Hottie Post.

Danielle Harris
Danielle Harris really should be everyone's Hottie of the Year, every year, because is there any other hot girl who shows up in more Horror flicks than she does? Stake Land, Hatchet II, Cyrus, The Victim, Chromeskull, Devil's Night... She's this generation's Jamie Lee Curtis, only way hotter. She's a busy girl. She's kinda like a dirty pixie; a dirty, murderous pixie who looks as good in skimpy clothes as she does all covered in blood. Seriously, isn't she like 4'9 or something? We're not poking fun here, so don't get it twisted; tiny or not, we're not fucking with her, because she's creepy. Creepy in a good way though. We look forward to seeing her in about 15 more movies in 2012.

Our Review of The Ward, Hatchett 2, Blood Night.
Her Horror Hottie Post 1, Post 2.

Amber Heard
This girl makes us want to be a lesbian. I mean she's basically the quintessential smoky hot blonde, isn't she? We admire the fact that she hates penis', because we do too (even our own.) Amber Heard has been showing up in Horror flicks for years now, going all the way back to the awesome All the Boys Love Mandy Lane in 2006. This year, she gave us The Ward, which was mediocre at best, and the insanely fun Drive Angry 3D, which didn't get the love it deserved. Nic Cage having sex during a gun fight, and Amber Heard walking around in a skimpy shirt and cut-off shorts... how is that not brilliant? this girl is a true classic beauty.

Our Review of Mandy Lane, The Ward, Drive Angry.
Her Horror Hottie Post 1, Post 2.

Amanda Seyfried's BOOBS.
Sure, Red Riding Hood sucked, and In Time was Sci-Fi and pretty much sucked too, but good lord have you seen this girl? Not only is she gorgeous, but she may have the some of best tittahs of all damn time. There's really not much else to say here. I guess we could mention that she's coming out in a Horror Thriller next year called Gone, but really, she's here because of the tittahs. BTW, she shows them in all of their naked glory in the creepy lesbian stalker movie, Chloe. You're welcome.

Our Review of Gone.
Her Horror Hottie Post 1, Post 2.


  1. Even though I'm totally down with all adaptations of Little Red Riding Hood, believe me when I say there is only one reason I watched that movie all the way through, and that's Amanda.

    Also totally love Amber and Danielle. Cannot get enough of them chicks.