December 28, 2011

Quick Review: Trespass (2011)

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1674784/
Oh Look, another crappy movie starring Nic Cage... and Cam Gigandet, who we just talked about starring in The Roommate. They honestly have a knack for being in some shitty movies, don't they?

At least we can forgive Nic Cage, because he usually does his kinetic, crazy shtick well, and he usually entertains us. Like here for example, where he plays a father frantically trying to keep a bunch of home invaders from offing his family, he's good. Of course the script is so bad, and the movie is so painfully slow and uneventful that by the time we're 20 minutes or so into things, we stopped caring. But he was good.

So was she, actually.
This is a dialogue-filled Thriller in which people talk, one of the crooks punches or threatens someone, then they talk some more; repeat that sequence over and over again until the end, and you've got yourself a movie called Trespass.

You want to see a good Home Invasion/Hostage movie, then go rent The Desperate Hours with Mickey Rourke. That's how a movie like this should be done... wait a minute, it already was.

And why is she not topless too?
After his awesomely schlocky Drive Angry 3D, we have to wonder why Nic Cage went back to a snooze-fest like this as a follow up. And Nicole Kidman is alive? Jesus, where has she been? Then again, we care as much about that as Tom Cruise likely does...

This movie isn't offensively bad, it's just far too boring and clumsy to be any good. See it if you must though.

Why Nic Cage why?
Nicole Kidman and Liana Liberato are in this. That's at least something.

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