*For the record, no locals really warned anyone about anything.
At 5:29 in, when one of the already annoying characters announces "I'm addicted to piss videos," any and all hope of this movie not sucking on a large scale went right out the window. And let's just forget that absolutely nothing Horror-related even comes close to happening until around the 28:00 mark (of a less than 80 minute movie), because when the "action" finally begins, it's so bad that it inspires sadness rather than any sort of fear, dread or tension.
"Hey dog-fucker, I bet you wish you finished high school now."
"Do you like a little moonshizzy, dog-fucker?"
Pelt isn't kitschy, clever or witty, even though it looks as if it the filmmakers thought otherwise. I'm not even sure why movies like this get made. Be as cheap as you want to be while making a Horror flick, but at least try your damnedest to make it good. Decent even. Low budget writers and directors need to stop thinking themselves more clever than they truly are. Save the humor for the professionals, and stick to the basic tenants of Horror movies; you know, like making us give a shit what happens on screen, give us an interesting character or two, build some tension, make a story that's either interesting or at the very least, visually compelling.
|Now that could have been visually compelling...|
It really goes without saying that this movie is awful, and there's really no reason to even waste a post talking about it, save for one, and her name is Amber Bollinger. She deserves a little bit of love.
|Take it all, Amber, take all of our love.|
|Yes, that's what we mean by "Twitter."|
Run away from this one.
Amber Marie Bollinger makes this movie watchable, if only to see her.