Theatrical Review: Captain America: Civil War (2016)

"The best Avengers movie yet."

(aka Avengers 3)
Release Date: May 6th.
Country: USA.
Rating: PG-13.
Written by: Christopher Markus and Stephen McFeeley.
Directed by: The Russo Brothers.
Starring: Chris Evans, Robert Downey Jr., Scarlett Johansson, Anthony Mackie, Chadwick Boseman, Elizabeth Olsen, Paul Rudd, and 90 other damn people whom we are not going to list here.

We grew up reading Marvel Comics, and so we're pretty happy campers when it comes to the movies that Marvel Films has been releasing since the first Iron Man.

They're not all perfect, and some of them (like Iron Man 2 or Thor 2) we can absolutely do without, but for the most part, they're big and fun, and we're always down to see what they're going to do next.

With Civil War, Marvel once again shows how to do a big ensemble Comic Book flick the right way, and not muck it up by trying to cramming too much into to little space, and doing so haphazardly. Yes, Batman vs. Superman: Dawn of They Should Have Taken Their Time to Build a Universe the Right Way, we're looking at you.

Long story short...

Everyone thinks that Bucky is evil, because he's an assassin, so they're out to get him, But Captain America isn't having it. The Government also thinks that The Avengers are a bunch of loose cannons who need to be reigned in, even though they've saved the world from certain doom twice now. They did destroy a ton of shit while saving the world, and plenty of people died in the fallout, so Uncle Sam may have a point.

The Secretary of State presents the team with The Sokovia Accords; a document that would allow the U.N. to control what the team does, and when, and tells them to sign it, or retire. As you'd expect, this splits the team down the middle, which causes a... Civil War!

There's also a guy named Zemo who is upset about his wife dying during The Avengers mission in Sokovia, so he's out to break the team apart from the inside, because, feelings.

Plenty of "Avengers, disassemble!" ensues.

THE GOOD GUYS.

Like the previous two Captain America movies, Civil War moves its compelling story along at a great pace, using plenty of action and even sentimentality to get the job done. It was fun as hell, and another solid entry in the Captain America Trilogy, which might be the best Comic Book trilogy of them all. That's debatable.

If you already love the Marvel movies, and especially their characters, then you'll most likely love them here as well. Tony Stark is his usual, tortured and snarky self; Cap is his usual righteous, heroic self; Black Widow and Scarlett Witch are bad-ass; and even the "bit" players like Falcon, War Machine, and Hawkeye (we say bit because they're either limited in screen time, or stick to the background more than the others), all do their thing in perfect form. 

As for what we loved the most about this movie...

• Black Panther was awesome to the point where he almost made the movie by himself. Chadwick Boseman was the perfect choice to play T'Challa, and it really sucks that we have to wait until 2018 to see his solo movie. The guy ruled every scene he was in. 
• Ant-Man, when the focus was on him, also kicked some major ass. I won't ruin his best moment, because it was really awesome, and you deserve to see it happen unspoiled, but damn it if I didn't pump my Fanboy fist in the air when it went down.
• Everything about Spider-Man was kick ass. Tom Holland is the perfect teenage Peter Parker, and although he wasn't in a ton of the movie, he stole the show when he was. Again, we can't wait to see his Marvel-produced solo flick.
• The Scarlet Witch got to show of her goods too, and we finally get to see her as the powerhouse that she is. In the comics, her powers know almost no limits, and it was cool to see a hint of what she can do in this one.
• The entire airport scene was exactly what every Comic Book flick needs. It was excellent.

THE OTHER GOOD GUYS.

Vision was hugely underpowered in this one. With the Mind Gem embedded in his head, he could have pretty much wiped everyone other than Scarlett Witch out, with little effort... which is probably why they held him in check and made him her babysitter instead of putting him into the action too much. I just really want to see him let loose. Probably in Infinity War i & II.

The didn't really do much with Crossbones either, which sucks because he's a cool villain, and Frank Grillo rocks.

Also, no Hulk kinda sucked.

HOPEFULLY HE'LL GET SOME MORE SCREEN TIME IN ANOTHER FLICK.

They could have done more with Baron Zemo. He was a great villain in the comics, but came off as kind of an average guy with a lame-ass reason for revenge in the movie.

ALSO, THE WINTER SOLDIER HAS ALWAYS SEEMED KINDA BLAH TO US.

There's plenty of fighting and violence throughout this one, but nothing very gory.

POOR RHODEY.

Nope. Only PG-13 material in this one.

YES, THIS PICTURE IS FROM THE WINTER SOLDIER, BUT IT'S PERFECT, SO DEAL WITH IT.

The Black Panther movie is going to rule. Same goes for Spidey.

T'CHALLA!

Yep, we're Fanboys at heart, and Captain America: Civil War thrilled the hell out of us. Is it the best Comic Book movie ever made? I don't know. Maybe. Probably not. It is an excellent flick though, and it's a way better Avengers movie that Age of Ultron was.

You pretty much already know if you're going to dig this one or not, so act accordingly. 

A

Captain America: Civil War is in theaters now. Go see it.

Yay, we've got a reason to post some pictures of Scarlett Johansson, Elizabeth Olsen, and Emily VanCamp!