31 Days of Creepy Kids, Day 6: Jack & Emily Poe (Home Movie, 2008)

Jack and Emily Poe

A wife, two kids, and a happy home is every man's suburban dream, isn't it? Well of course it isn't, but a lot of people sure seem to act like it is. Mute strippers that obey on command; now that's every man's dream. If you can't get the strippers though, an ugly chick that obeys is fine. Right guys? Guys?

Well, maybe I'm wrong... nah.

At least his wife is hot...

Jack and Emily Poe are fraternal twins. Their Dad is a nutty pastor who tapes everything the family does, and wears odd costumes around the house. Their Mom is a repressed shrink who sneaks off to the greenhouse to smoke, because she hates her life. The kids pass their days by stapling frogs to trees, killing dogs, chewing their classmates to (near) death, and trying to frame their dad for abuse. Yes, they are definitely creepy.

Why!?!?

The kids are mostly quiet throughout the movie, which makes them feel even more tainted. They start off fairly normal, then grow progressively more violent and menacing. Best of all, the twins are played by real life brother and sister, so they came into this movie already having that creepy bond that young siblings tend to have, though they aren't real-life twins.

The way things unfold along the way is both subtle and terrifying. There were a few scenes that actually made us tense up and gave us some chills. It's rare for a Found Footage flick to be so effective; most of them tend to have good moments here and there intermingled with a lot of lame plot devices geared towards allowing the movie to continue. Home Movie was well-paced, mostly sensible, and utterly chilling. What's it with damn kids giving me chills!

You shouldn't have put them in time out... you should have grounded them with bullets.

This is one creepy, unsettling, and effective Found Footage flick. Some of the Dad's actions are odd and can throw you out of the movie for a minute or two, but the good stuff more than makes up for the flaws. And the good stuff is.... the kids. There's a lot going on in this movie, and the kids are at the heart of it all. I still say the window shade scene proves my Supernatural theory. Either way, you should see this flick.

Pants were shat.