The Texas Chainsaw Massacre
In Attendance- Me, Machine, Chris, Geo, Amanda and Teryn.
Cast Members of Note- The legendary Marilyn Burns and Gunnar Hansen, and the narration talents of John Laroquette.
What's it about?- The guy from Night Court pretty much spells it out for us at the beginning; Some dumb kids go poking around on an isolated Texas farmhouse one day, and they piss off the bumpkin cannibals living there, thus sealing their fate. He goes on to say that it's mostly the crippled guy in the wheelchair's fault, since him being slow and cumbersome basically turned this into a massacre. Good job Franklin.
|Did you have fun snooping around, dummy?|
|Dance, Leatherface, dance!|
I could talk for hours about the things that make this movie classic, but I have to assume that most people already know all about those things. Leatherface is one of the biggest genre icons of all time, sharing the throne with Jason, Freddy and Michael. He doesn't speak, but his dead skin mask really says all that needs to be said.
It was banned all over the world, condemned by the church, and shook audiences to the core... what more can you really ask for in a horror classic?
|"Oh hell no, bitch, you on your own!"|
The Downright Horrendous- Would you really go in a deserted, old, creepy farmhouse when you heard those pig noises? Me neither. "Hello, you in here? No? Ok then, buh-bye." Then I'd run like a half witted moron from the creepy pig noises. I'd live though. I'd live.
|That poor girl...|
Best Line- "Shut up you bitch hog!" or Larroquette's famous voice-over "The events of that day were to lead to the discovery of one of the most bizarre crimes in the annals of American history, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre."
What did we learn?- You don't go poking around on peoples land. Ever. Also, picking up hitchhikers seldom works out for the best.
A+ TCM is without a doubt one of the best horror films of all time, if not the best. It's sparse, gritty, shocking, nasty, disturbing and dreadful... as a horror fan if you don't own this, you're crazy. If you haven't at least seen this, you need to go now and check it out.
This movie had its fair share of 70's hotness going for it -in the form of Marilyn Burns and Terry McMinn- even if things got way too disturbing to enjoy it in a fun way...