July 29, 2009

DVD Review: The Breed (2006)

I love movies that involve doggy-style, and this one has plenty of it...

Cast Members of Note- Taryn Manning, Michelle Rodriguez, Oliver Hudson, Eric Lively, Hill Harper and Lisa-Marie Schneider.

A group of Post-Grad students head to a secluded island for a weekend of fun and hi-jinks, which mainly consists of drinking, trying to get laid and ripping on each other. Of course, the lone black guy in the movie takes the brunt of a lot of the ribbing since he's the "tag-a-long" and all. The poor guy just wants to get laid, but the snooty white girls will have none of it!

"Um, like, no and stuff. "
They drink, play a game of "spin the whore," drink, shoot bows, drink, and drink. When a little puppy shows up, it not only warms everyone's hearts, but it also brings death with it. The little scamp is part of a dog-gang that bullies humans and steals their wallets. They even smoke cigarettes! They're bad dogs!

Spin the whore.
The vicious dog-gang sets upon the lame College kids, nipping and biting their way through them in a blaze of dog-glory. In what has to be the films highlight, Taryn Manning actually karate fights a dog! It's really something to see. Will it be enough to save them though, or will the dogs have their day? I'm not going to spoil the ending for you here, but I will say that it doesn't look good for the humans.

The humans are fucked.
For a B-movie, The Breed was well-made, well-acted, and had a pretty decent level of suspense. The idea of intelligent, pissed-off dogs terrorizing a group of people may sound absurd, but it works to great effect here. Apparently Wes Craven sprinkled a little of his magic Horror dust over this production, because this was a pretty cool movie.

The realism on display throughout this one is what really made me the most happy; for once, we get a group of people that thinks things through and act pretty smart. It's pretty refreshing to feel as though the filmmakers made a movie for intelligent people for a change.

"We'll name him Death-Bringer!"
Bad dogs! You don't kill the hot women! Go lay down!

This dog needs to go back to Bitch School!
The ending... really? Does every single Horror movie have to use the same lame-ass ploy for one final jump scare in the very last scene?!? Boo! Yeah we get it, assholes; you suck at closing a film properly.

Us too, man. Us too.
Dog murder, dogs mauling people, arrow violence, dog explosions... there's all sorts of dog-on-dog, dog-on-people, people-on-dog, an even people-on-people violence to be had here.

Yeah, don't help him or anything.

These are the puppies I really wanted to see...
"Woof!" or "Bark!" or "Grrrr!" or "Some scary ass lassie's, that's what!"

Dogs hate people. Also, never trust puppies, because they lie.

This dog hates you.
This is a surprisingly good movie. Smart, tense, violent, well-made... this is definitely one to rent or buy, depending on your mood. Thanks for giving us a good one, Uncle Wes!


The Breed is available now on Blu-ray and DVD.


The women of The Breed make us howl with delight.

1 comment :

  1. This film is great, but yeah- the final scare kinda sucked. I really like Michelle Rodriguez though. She's great in everything I've seen her in.