February 14, 2012

As we say goodbye to yet another Valentines Day...

... let's take a moment to pay tribute to love in all of its creepy, vile, and just-plain-wrong, glory. Maybe some of the Horror flick romances below captured our hearts and souls, or maybe others made us feel the need to go and take a cleansing shower... Who are we to judge, though?

Let's just celebrate amore' and ignore the fact most of the examples below are creepy as hell.

Who doesn't think raping a hot dead chick is romantic? You? Well then, don't watch Deadgirl, because that's pretty much what the movie is about. That, and love.
She's talking about her penis, Oskar, because she's got one. Gives a whole new meaning to the title Let the Right One In, doesn't it?
Jennifer's Body was an awful movie, but the sex scene between Amanda Seyfried and Megan Fox did make us believe in love again.
"Mmm, Mom." Yes, Sleepwalkers went there.
Ron Jeremy's man hammer loved everyone in the movie One-Eyed Monster; in fact, it detached itself from his body and went on a porn-whore rape spree.
I'm not even touching this one. Labyrinth.
Yes, this crazy whore from the movie Macabre did make love to a rotting head named Fred, which is horrifying on many levels, but you have to admire her conviction.
Snowy knew exactly what he meant when he told her "I'm going to flock the shit out of you." She didn't much like it, but she knew.
The Loved Ones taught us that In Australia, the love between a father and a daughter involves sex, torture, murder, and a basement full of Mongoloids.
That's it for this year's Valentine's Day Massacre, and look, you all survived. Now I hope whoever is sending me wet leather gloves that smell like pickles will stop, because, VD is over. Also, it's really creepy.


  1. i can be slow-witted with acronyms, and the "goodbye to VD" kinda threw me off since i haven't read the previous entries, so i went around thinking "venereal disease" for quite a while before it clicked...yeah..

  2. Maybe we had the clap, you never know...