Netflix Review: The Rezort (2017)

"Jurassic Park with zombies."

Yes, The Rezort is basically Jurassic Park with zombies.

Maybe that's a simplistic (and even unfair) way to describe the movie, but it's the first thing that popped into our minds once we got past the 90-minute news montage that opened the movie, and the story actually started unfolding.

I don't think that it's a bad thing either. It's actually a pretty cool concept, and so what if the filmmakers said "Hey, what if we did a movie like Jurassic Park, but with zombies, man!"

If it works, it works, and it definitely works well here.

After a near zombie apocalypse which saw mankind wage war and win against legions of the viral undead, losing 2 billion lives in the process, the world begins to rebuild itself. Part of that rebuilding involves capitalism, and the monetary exploitation of the tragic events, because that's what we humans do. That's where The Rezort comes in.

IT'S LIKE A BIG VIDEO GAME!

The Rezort is an island resort/theme park or sorts, which allows paying customers to hunt and kill zombies to their heart's content. It's all perfectly safe and well-regulated, with no real danger involved for any of the guests... until a hacker group does a little number on The Rezort's computer system, which results in the zombies being freed, and just about everyone on the island becoming food.

SHE HUNGRY.

You know the drill from here on out: there's a group of people who have to band together to survive, which includes a pretty, likable final girl; her boyfriend who might be an asshole; a slutty (we hope) blonde chick; a bad-ass who's a crack shot with a rifle; a few dumbasses who you just know are destined to die painfully; an evil, money-hungry businesswoman who you really want to see die painfully; and a few other people who are just there to up the body count. And of course, very little goes to plan.

Good times.

STICK WITH HIM. HE KNOWS HOW TO STAY ALIVE.

The Rezort was a good zombie flick. It gets a little heavy-handed with the "humans are the real monsters" vibe that runs throughout, and in typical Horror fashion, many of the characters do some truly stupid shit, but at the end of the day, this is a bloody, fun, and well put-together zombie flick.

The zombies look, and act, really cool in this one. Yes, they're the fast moving zombies which many Horror fans seem to hate, but if that ploy works for the movie, then we have no issue with it. They really don't movie crazy fast or anything, so if you're one of those fans who prefer slower-moving zombies, don't panic.

The cast did a great job here with a script that gave them some rather clunky dialogue to chew on. Jessica De Gouw, whom we loved in the excellent Aussie Apocalyptic flick, These Final Hours (Review HERE), was the perfect final girl in this one, and she's destined for big things, we think. This also may be the best thing we've seen Dougray Scott in for quite some time. We dig that guy. 

ELEN RHYS WAS A SEXY TREAT AS WELL.

The Rezort offers plenty in the way of typical zombie movie kills, and there's no shortage of bloodshed to be had here. I'm not sure what the balance between practical FX and CGi was in this movie, but it all looked pretty great and gruesome.

SEE, THERE'S SOME BLOOD!

There isn't any skin in this one at all.

THIS IS AS CLOSE TO A SEX SCENE AS THIS MOVIE GETS.

"You had the map."

AND SHE'S GOT THE GUN.

The Rezort may not be a perfect film, and it definitely tries to do more with its scattered storylines that it maybe should, but it's bloody, intense, and we loved Jessica De Gouw and Dougray Scott together. We'd gladly sit thought this one again, and we'd definitely welcome a sequel, especially given the way that it ended.

Bring it on.

B-

The Rezort is streaming on Netflix now.

Sexy survivors, Jessica De Gouw and Elen Rhys.