December 13, 2013

Contracted (2013)
We had such high hopes for Contracted. We really did. It's got a great premise, it delivers disturbing content like few other movies we've seen this year, and it stars the vastly underrated Najarra Townsend.

The main problem with this movie is that its colorful strokes are more impressive than the overall picture that they end up painting.

The Bad and Downright Horrendous sections below are going to contain some major plot spoilers, so if you want to get the gist of what we thought about Contracted, but still intend on watching it anyhow, skip those sections.

"Don't be a whore, or you'll get aids and die." I think that's pretty much the point of this movie.

Sam is a lesbian who decides to go to a party one night, because the girl she's dating is brushing her off, and she's all sad about it. Being a recovering drug addict, it makes perfect sense to go to a party when you're emotionally fragile, because you're not going to have the urge to self-medicate or anything. Of course, Sam proceeds to get herself good and schnockered.

Aah, relationship drama.
Once schnockered, Sam gets roofied, and effectively date-raped, by some guy named BJ. The next morning she wakes up feeling awful, and to find that her vagina is profusely bleeding. She takes a shower, bleeds out a little, and then heads to work.While at work, she has a little "spell" and fills the toilet with blood, and decides to go see the doctor.

Looks like a head cold to me.
The doctor does nothing for her, so she goes and sees her girlfriend, who also does nothing for her. She goes home and finds her mom there, who also does nothing for her, and at this point, the it's apparent that it's going to be up to her to do something for herself... which she doesn't.

Yeah, honey, you're pretty much on your own.
From here on out, Sam finds herself falling apart, both literally and figuratively, and she's frantic to discover why. turns out that BJ (her rapist) has given her some crazy sort of aids that makes her expel blood from all of her orifices, lose teeth, and just rot away in general. Body Horror and calamity ensue.

Too bad her Mom isn't right around the corner to give her some help.
If Contracted got one thing right, it would be its disturbing content. It was really skeevy to watch Sam's body begin to fall apart, and at times, it was even sickening. The FX were solid here, and they made this movie a messy, bloody good time... in that aspect.

The opening scene of this movie was profoundly disturbing. It was minimal and quick, but it creeped us right the hell out.

Najarra Townsend is a talented girl. She's hot, she's a great actress, and she has a good screen presence. Her character here sucks, but that's no fault of hers.

Don't pout. We like you.

This movie's biggest failing is that it had an awesome and unique premise, which it managed to mangle beyond belief; A guy has sex with a dead body and then proceeds to have sex with a random girl at a party, which ends up slowly turning her into a zombie, which potentially turns her into Patient Zero for the Zombie Apocalypse. Now, I'm guessing about the Patient Zero part of that plot line, but It sounds like that's what the writer was going for. Sounds pretty cool, right?

Too bad the rest of the movie was so ridiculous and distracting that it made us not care anymore.

I read a review about a month ago that said "If you can get past the idiocy and self-absorption of every major character in the piece, you will enjoy this creepy film." To that I say, why should I have to? It was a chore to find any sort of sympathy for Samantha, let alone everyone else in this movie, and she was going through something truly horrendous that should definitely garner my sympathy.

Maybe writer/director/producer Eric England did all of that on purpose. Maybe this was his little jab at how clueless and vapid people are. I don't know. What I do know is that scathing indictment or not, it all came off as annoying rather than clever.

No. Just, no.
There's so much about this movie that doesn't ring true, that it pretty much kills the parts that actually do.


A girl has some dizzy spells, has a liberal amount of blood coming out of her vagina, goes to the doctor, he looks at her and decides that she's got a cold and a rash? Which part of that causes hemorrhaging exactly? Then when she goes back to see him two days later, and it obvious that something is extremely wrong with her, he doesn't admit her to the Hospital or give her any antibiotics or anything, he just says that he can't say what the issue is because her bloodwork isn't back yet, and "these things take time?" He stares at her like she's a medical anomaly, but does absolutely nothing for her.

His grand advice? "Do not come into contact with anyone, until we can determine what it is we're dealing with." Oh, you mean like quarantine myself? Like they would do in a Hospital, if you admitted me to one? Right.

Speaking of doing nothing, no one in the movie tells this girl, who is obviously falling apart in literal fashion, that she needs to go to the Hospital asap. No one calls 911, not even Sam herself. Wouldn't you be so freaked out that you'd call 911 immediately?

Then we have the mother who sees her daughter vomiting a liberal amount of blood, and not only kinda shrugs it off, but doesn't even come back to check on her? Oh, because she had a drug problem before, and this is just that issue rearing its ugly head again? Your Daughter is vomiting blood profusely... on drugs or not, get her some help.

So Sam's vagina is bleeding, she has a nasty vaginal rash, she pulls out her tooth while brushing her teeth, a maggot falls out of her vagina, her eye is turning red, and she feels horrible... so she just goes and takes a nap? Oh right, her doctor is waiting on her blood results, so, forget taking yourself to a Hospital where they could address your rapidly declining health.

And would you really kiss someone who is obviously sick, and has half of their bottom lip missing?

I could go on, but I'm sure you get the point.


Oh look, an angry, lesbian riot grrrl who thinks that all men are pigs*. How refreshing. *We may all be pigs, but there's no need to be a dick about it, dick.
This one is plenty gory. There's a ton of blood and nastiness on display throughout Contracted, and most Gorehounds will enjoy the fun of it all.

Poor girl's got herself a bloody vagine.
The only reason that Contracted gets a D+ grade, and not the DO NOT WANT which it mostly deserves, is because that visually (and viscerally), it delivers the uncomfortable, messy goods. It's well made, and as an adventure in being grossed-out, the movie works well.

As a movie in general, it does not. Contracted is filled with unlikable characters dong blatantly ignorant things, which in the end ruins everything else that's going on around them. The more I think about it, the more I believe that the stupid characters were stupid by design, and existed to make a point, but it doesn't make what I just watched sit any better with me.

A weak script'll get ya every time.


Najarra Townsend is only 24-years-old, and she already has 64 acting credits under her belt. Also, she's really pleasant to look at. So, impressive on both counts.


  1. Oh! I really enjoyed this movie myself, though I can see what you're saying on many points.

  2. Lopts of people enjoyed this one, Jenn, I think that I just nitpick more than most :)~

  3. The character Riley must be really really really blind too.

  4. Yeah Anon, it's things exactly like that that made this movie suffer. He was either blind, a complete idiot, or a very over-eager virgin who was also a blind idiot.

  5. I expected more gore when I made a quick glance at your review because I was determined to watch the movie myself. Yeah, I did and was disappointed. The gore was alright but the actions from all and every person was beyond any logic or realism. The first thing is, you don't drink something you can't remember that you ordered it. Of course, he spiked it and is going to take advantage of you. And if you have been raped and you go to the doc because your vagina is bleeding like crazy, you don't lie to him.

    The guy was incredible horny. He didn't question why she was sitting in the dark and thought that she was slippery because he wanted to believe that he was the one making her soaking wet. Too bad that it was a whole lot of shit going on down there. Once again, I was prepaired to see a really nasty scene but have been disappointed again.

  6. Very little about the movie made sense, Myra. We're still not sure how it mad so many peoples "Best of" lists for the year.

  7. Fell asleep twice trying to watch....

  8. I really enjoyed this movie! It was definitely flawed, but I thought the story overall made up for it. I can see how she struggled to get proper help considering she had an addiction in the past (and her mum was clearly a bitch). Great ending too!

    I would give it a B+

  9. Fair enough, Anon. It just didn't work like that for us.

  10. I am extremely forgiving under the right circumstances with horror movies. It was fascinating enough for me to power through the ridiculous parts. I was totally prepared for how this was going to go down as soon as the Dr. called the black discoloration of veins growing up from the girl's cooter a "rash." I like air tight plots, true, but I was still entertained and that's what counts (for me).

  11. Fair enough, Megan. We knew that plenty of people would like this one, it jsut rubbed us the wrong way for some reason.

  12. First of all this movie was dark and bizarre. Second of all the characters were all scumbags including the lead. Third of all it goes from being a disease movie to a zombie ending with no warning. We see this scumbag girl suffer from a horrible unknown disease for 99 percent of the movie with a lot of weird, dark creepy shit happening throughout the whole movie and then at the very end... It turns into a zombie movie. Very weird movie one of the weirdest ever made. And even though I hated the main character this movie was so dark I still felt bad for her suffering. Overall a movie with shit script shit characters really dark and disturbing and a shift from unknown serious deadly disease in a real world environment to a zombie movie just made it even more bizarre . 2/10.

    1. This is a late reply, but there was PLENTY of warning that this would end up being a zombie movie. Like, ridiculous amounts.

      Necrophiliac rapes girl > Girl starts rotting alive > Girl ends up a living corpse (with a taste for human flesh)

      Kind of obvious, really.

    2. Yeah i get all that all the first ones you are very true but how did she have a taste for human flesh? Also why didn't that guy who screwed the dead corpse with the biohazard tag on her foot get all messed up like her?

    3. Because guys are usually STD asymptomatic and will infect multiple women before they even know somethings wrong. Also, they had to set up the sequel.

  13. Will you be reviewing the 2nd one? Unfortunately it's not much better than the 1st:-)

  14. I know I am very late on this topic, but I just watched this film on Netflix and was totally drawn in...Until the insufferable stubborness of the lead character and the outright stupidity of everyone in the movie made me go "WTF?". The plot to surmise is pretty good in my opinion, and I love the "Day 1, Day 2, Day 3...of 3" thing. However, the things that ruin this film for me are the fact that even though she's literally dying inside and out, she seeks help from no one, only sees the doctor twice, and tells everyone she's "okay"- get the hell out of here. Then, if that is not enough, no one seems to notice that this girl is obviously infected with something the likes of which the CDC would have to deal with. "You don't look too well", oh but you decide to make out with her?- Once again, get the hell out of here. Then the other character has sex with her? Wtf? No one in this movie is smart. No one. At all. And that's what pisses me off most about this movie. In short, the rapidly decaying lead who's declining health and mental state that drive her into madness and erratic behavior, to eventually turn into a zombie is spectacular. And her character was played well by the actress. But the stupid points, and there are a lot, bring this movie down so much that it leaves a resonating feeling of annoyance. What could have been a perfect film was damaged by things that could have been easily avoided.

  15. I too just watched this on Netflix and it's sad because this movie could have been soo good! The tone and atmosphere of this movie were so great and haunting yet the characters just destroyed it completely. So much disappoint :/

  16. I get everyone's response to this film, but I would like to play Devils Advocate if I may. Yes I to hated most of the characters and yes even the leading lady was acting with total disregard to everyone and everything that was happening to her. That being said I believe the writer got it right, now bear with me a sec... it is a human condition to overlook downfalls of the people we care about. We have all seen decline or addiction or whatever and chose to ignore it for a short period esp when the person in which this is happening has sought medical attention. Remember as bad as it was it was still only 3days and when anyone asked adout her she blew them off. It is my opinion that her"friends" and her family would have stepped in if there was more time, because that is what we do when faced with tragedy, we ignore until we can't.

  17. Please discuss the beginning with me. Anyone? The guy is having sex with a dead woman, correct? then why don't we see the guy's legs and feet on the table or slab? Is he having sex with her body in some other way, like using her mouth? I wondered if he was eating her, like he is a different kind of zombie? Then he rinses out a cup. It's too hard to be a rubber, I believe, plus, he would just toss a rubber in the garbage, not rinse it out. Does he stick the cup in the corpse's mouth or vagina and then have sexual intercourse? That cup would be pretty good protection. But, he most likely did not use protection during his date-rape. So, did he have missionary style sex with a bio-hazard corpse using a cup for a rubber even though we hear him grunting and banging but do not see his legs on the table with hers? Please, answer.