VOD Reveiw: It Stains the Sands Red (2017)

"One of the best Indie zombie movies ever."

(aka Zombie vs. Stripper.)
Release Date: July 28th.
Country: USA.
Rating: NR.
Written by: Colin Minihan and Stuart Ortiz.
Directed by: Colin Minihan.
Starring: Brittany Allen, Juan Reidinger, and a bunch of other dudes who come and go.

One half of the filmmaking duo The Vicious Brothers, writer/director Colin Minihan has given us a zombie movie that breaks a bit from the norm with It Stains the Sands Red, and it may be the best work that he's done to date.

After being overrun by the undead, Las Vegas is in ruins. Molly and her cholo boyfriend escape the city in a Porsche, heading for an airstrip where their skeevy pals are waiting to fly them all to safety. Molly, being an alcoholic coke whore, needs to throw up her night's worth of partying, and when they pull over on the barren desert road, the car gets stuck in the sand.

THEY PAINT THE SANDS DUMB.

Out of nowhere, a zombie shambles towards them, and after some of the worst shooting in the history of guns, it kills Molly's boyfriend, and leaves her all alone to run through the desert with it in hot pursuit. She eventually names the zombie Smalls, because she has this thing about small penises.

JOKE'S ON HER: HE'S PACKING 9 INCHES OF DEAD HEAT.

As Smalls chases Molly through the barren wasteland of the desert while she's wearing high heels and running short on water and food, she also has to survive other people, the loss of her cocaine, and she must come to terms with the fact that she's all out of tampons, and Aunt Flow has still not left town.

She's determined to survive though, so we can't help but pull for her.

WHY SHE WANTED TO TEACH SMALLS HOW TO PLAY CATCH, WE'LL NEVER KNOW.

As much as the zombie film has been done to death in recent years, It Stains the Sands Red brings a fresh take to the sub-genre that relies as much on story as it does blood and gore to spin its narrative.

There are two things that made this movie so great. The first is Brittany Allen's performance as busted stripper Molly. Through flashbacks, we're shown that she's a deadbeat mom who has a weakness for cocaine and douchey men, but as the movie goes on, we get to learn more about her, and the pain that she harbors deep inside, which made us pull for her to survive.

It's basically a redemption story, and who doesn't love to see a stripper be redeemed?

SHE'S NOT GOING TO BE ABLE TO LAPDANCE HER WAY OUT OF THIS ONE.

The second, and the most unique aspect of the film, is the co-dependant relationship that develops between Molly and Smalls. Sure, Smalls may be a zombie who wants to eat Molly's face off, but the events of the movie actually make him sympathetic in a way too, even if it's because of Molly's emotional journey.

I do have to say that the dude at the beginning was a lousy shot, and Molly does some dumb shit throughout the movie kind of left us scratching our heads, although her dumb actions at least served to set up some bloody scenes. I wasn't thrilled with the way that the movie ended either.

LIKE THIS ONE.

Smalls wreaks all kinds of bloody havoc to feed his zombie hunger, and Molly is pretty handy with tools. Also, there's the whole tampon thing...

SHE'S HAD A ROUGH COUPLE OF DAYS.

Brittany Allen looks stripper-sexy throughout, but there's no nudity. There is a rape scene though, so be warned.

COKE WHORES DO NOT FARE WELL IN THE DESERT.

A different kind of zombie flick, It Stains the Sands Red works because of a great performance by Brittany Allen, who totally sells the emotional weight of the story. The bloody carnage was also on point, and desert-set action felt pretty realistic throughout.

This is a cool flick, and definitely one worth checking out this Halloween Season. 

B+

It Stains the Sands Red is available now on Blu-ray, DVD, and VOD.

Brittany Allen has gone from Soap Opera star to Horror Hottie, and we're glad to have her.