August 2, 2017

Giallo Month Review: Tenebrae (1982)

http://amzn.to/2hmM5pG
*This is a repost of a review that we did in 2008.

An American writer heads to Rome where he finds that his latest book, Tenebrae, is so shitty that it's driven someone insane enough to begin killing people. Of course, it's the sluts that have to go first, because in Italy, slutty girls are considered evil and must be made to pay for their sexy sins.

THAT'S FOR GIVING HALF OF MILAN THE CLAP, WHORE!
A few lesbians and a nosy teenage girl later, and the killer is ready to move on to John Saxon! Now who would kill John Saxon? I mean really? He's always so likable in his films... Anywho, more murders ensue, including the murder of the murderer, which makes it clear that there is more than one murderer murdering people? Whatever.

"BUT WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN?"
Dario Argento knows how to do Giallo; the mystery, the black gloves, the excessive violence towards women, the naked chicks, the crazy music, the camera work, the gore, the slow-moving and nonsensical storyline... From Bird With the Crystal Plumage to Opera, Argento had a better run of Gialli films than any other director ever did.  The man simply delivers better than does any other director of these types of films.

THOSE VISUALS THOUGH...
Many Horror fans will lambaste me for saying that Tenebrae isn't one of Argento's best efforts; it's certainly good, but it falls well behind his other films like Suspiria, Deep Red, Bird with the Crystal Plumage, Inferno, and Phenomena on our "Best of Argento" list. Maybe the fact that it's more brightly lit than his other movies, or that it's more of a detective story than anything else, that threw me for a loop... Still, it's a great piece of Giallo that is required viewing for any fan of the sub-genre.

WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING? LOL
 
Why do people in these films always snoop around when they should be running or grabbing a weapon of some sort?

GET OFF OF THE PHONE AND RUN, DUMMY!
 
Just once, ONCE, can an Italian Horror flick be completely coherent, and not leave me scratching my head about something at the end? Once is all I'm asking for here!

WHY?!?
 
Plenty of blood and gore to go around in this one, with most of the kills feeling more sadistic than usual for an Argento movie.

SHE'S HAVING A ROUGH DAY.
Boobs and butts galore in this one! The Italians are always good like that.

Now that is our kind of lady.
"Pervert... filthy slimy pervert!"

The usual Gialli suspects.
Tenebrae may not be The Bird With the Crystal Plumage or Deep Red, but it is one of Argento's best Giallo offerings.

B+

Tenebrae is available now on Blu-ray.

http://synapse-films.com/dvds/tenebrae-limited-edition-steelbook-combo-pack-blu-ray-dvd-cd/

Ania Pieroni was one of the hottest horror chicks of the 80's... if not ever.

5 comments :

  1. I don't want to spoil your pleasure, but your kind of lady is a notorious trans that goes by the name of Eva Robins. He/She actually calls herself an hermaphrodite

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  2. Your kind of lady (in the pic anyway) is really a dude.

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    Replies
    1. You'r wrong. Actually the girl in the pic is Ania Pieroni (a real woman as well as Mater Lacrimarum in Argento's Inferno).
      Eva Robins is the most famous Italian hermaphrodite born (now she's a total woman) and she's the girl with the red heels.

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  3. The brunette lady that painted the whole kitchen with her own blood is Veronica Lario, Silvio Berlusconi's future wife (now divorced).

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