Review: Tony (2010)

"A bit underwhelming, but creepy none the less..."

Cast Members of Note- Peter Ferdinando, Lorenzo Camporese, Frank Boyce, and Lucy Flack.

Tony is an mousy, socially-awkward, creepy British guy who gets picked on and pushed around an awful lot. He brings it on himself, being a shut-in welfare-leeching loner, who watches old 80's action movies and has no social skills whatsoever, but still you have to feel for the guy. Maybe just a little bit.

He does that for hours sometimes.

Most of his days are filled with watching some Chuck Norris movies, cruising gay bars and killing leather bears, befriending random drug addicts, creeping hookers out, talking to neighborhood boys, getting beat up, chopping meat, leeching off of Government money, drinking plenty of squash (whatever the hell that is), and getting beat up. He was obviously not hugged enough as a child.

So that's really it as far as the story goes. I guess that the audience is supposed to wonder things like will get the job or won't he, did he kill the kid or not, or does he go to leather bear night at the Pink Pucker Hole regularly, or just when he's in the mood, but who really cares.

What is in those bags?

This is a very subtle movie. Raw, unnerving, disturbing and quiet, Tony reminds me an awful lot of the 80's classic Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer... except that Tony was nowhere near as engaging or disturbing, though it did give it the old college try. The movie meanders along, showing us things that happen, but it never quite ties together in a cohesive plot. As a glimpse into the life of a killer, it's aces. As a story about a killer, what he goes through, and he or the story reaching some sort of pinnacle or resolution, it's a bust.

"He said bust, mate!"

The ending fell a bit flat and left me fairly unsatisfied. It made sense, and I get why it ended like it did, but I guess I kept waiting for some kind of big payoff, and I never got one. Then again, the whole movie didn't have much of a plot to begin with.

High fashion.

Am I crazy, or did this movie have a mildly homophobic streak running through it? More than once Tony trolled the neighborhood Gay Nightclubs, brought a guy home, and ended up doing him in as if to say "they had it coming to them. " It's probably just that the character himself has some unresolved Homosexuality issues, but it just felt harsh to me.

And for the record, the Devil is a top. Always. Never forget that.

Told ya so.

There isn't much, but what we do get is stark and morbidly creepy. The disposing of the bodies is especially realistic, and made me swear off of chopped meat for a while.

Ugh.

Other than a shirtless leather bear in bed, and a scantily-clad hooker, we get none of the naked goods.

It's always the quiet ones. Also, don't pick on the quiet ones.

Watch out, gay dude, it's a trap!

I guess I was expecting more from this one, and it's probably my own fault that I didn't love Tony like I thought I would. It was good, it hit the right chords as far as being creepy and disturbing, but it felt so understated to me that it lost a lot of the impact that I believe it could have had. I'd say this one is a missed step or two from being a modern day classic. For shame. Still, it's absolutely worth a look, so do yourself a favor and check it out on DVD.

C+

Do random television checks actually happen in England? Do they actually give out citations to appear in court if you don't have a license for your telly? I don't believe it...