Review: We Are the Night (2011)

"We are the dirty, slutty night."

Cast Members of Note- Karoline Herfurth, Nina Hoss, Jennifer Ulrich, and Anna Fischer.

What's not to love about a gang of sexy Vampire party girls who smoke, drink, drive fast cars, have all kinds of casual sex, engage in random lesbianism, and drain the blood of deserving losers? Aside from the chance of maybe becoming their food... nothing.

You bad girl!

It's not all fun and games with the ladies of the night though, because they have a rather large penchant for blood... mainly because they're Vampires, but that's not excuse, is it? Then again, women want what they want, and if you give them an ultimate power like Vampirism, they're pretty much going to kill you and steal your credit cards. Because even in the afterlife, women like to shop.

You just paid for that, don't bite it!

The story doesn't really matter so much, as it's fairly generic and simple; the Vampire girls run around the city acting all entitled and decadent, happy with their way of life until the Lesbo of the group brings in a new girl, which pretty much fucks up their whole scheme. Why, you ask? Because of forbidden love, and a detective with a penis who who is mysteriously drawn (also by love) to the new girl as well. Excessive bloodletting ensues.

"You're mine, bitch."

It's sleek and pretty to look at, we can definitely claim that much. Aside from its shiny visual aspects, Wir Sind Die Nacht is basically an average Vampire tale, which does a decent job of entertaining, even though it slips into Romance-land towards the end. And no, contrary to the claims and opinions of morons across the Internet, this movie isn't like Twilight at all. Just because there's a doomed romance mixed in with the Vampire shenanigans, doesn't mean it belongs in the same vein at all. If we're being honest, most Vampire flicks involve the "L" word (Love, not Lesbian), and unless were comparing Twilight to Dracula or Lost Boys, we can't do that with this movie either.

Like we said before, it's a slick and pretty movie, with some good FX and a solid overall atmosphere about it. It's nice to see a movie involving a gang of hot chicks causing trouble for a change too. If you like a glossy, stylish ride, you'll dig this movie.

...It's bloody too.

Arguably, the best part of the movie is the stuff involving Charlotte's history and back story. The bit with her Daughter towards the end was oddly... touching. Why they didn't explore aspects like this a bit more, we can't say. A bit more character depth, and this could have been a far better movie.

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What starts off very promising ends up being a sappy little romance in the end. As we said above, the strongest points of this movie -that kicked it off to a pretty strong start- ended up by the wayside after the halfway point, where it all becomes a tale of forbidden and impossible love. Some pretty heavy jealousy drama too. Lesbian and straight, mind you. We don't hate love, but it does kinda suck when it kills a good story.

Now why didn't they explore this love story?!?

Neck breaking, gun violence, blood drinking, hot chicks burning alive and a pipe in the gut... a decent amount of gore is on display here.

This was a pretty bloody scene.

Nothing naked here save for some bare backs. There is some lesbian kissing, but the sexiness never seems to go too far.

"Guten abend."

Undead German chicks like to party. Also, love tends to screw everything up.

Bad Girls.

As Vampire movies go, this one was decent enough. Had they explored the back story's of the characters a bit more, it could have been something special, but as it is, it's just decent. It's definitely a case of style over substance here, with the sexiness and bloodletting being the backbone of the movie. Vampire enthusiasts may like it because they tend to love all things Vampy, but it really doesn't bring anything new to the sub-genre

C

We want to turn this Frau (Jennifer Ulrich) upside down.