VOD Review: Treehouse (2015)

When we first say the trailer for Treehouse, it looked like it was going to be a good old fashioned Teen Thriller that would offer plenty of atmosphere and some genuine scares. It looked enjoyable, and most of all, it looked fun.

Well, it was that kind of movie at the start, but somewhere towards the back half it turned into something else and lost most of its compelling attributes, which probably has to due with Director Michael G. Bartlett re-writing the latter half of the film.

Having now seen the movie, we'd really like to see how the final act went in the original script.

When teenage Elizabeth arrives home from School to find her house all muddy and trashed, and her little brother, Little Bob, missing, she grabs a rifle, takes off her shoes, and heads off into the woods to find him. Then, because she's a (presumably) 15-year-old girl, she trips and falls, starts crying, and goes missing too.

DON'T CALL THE SHERIFF OR ANYTHING, YOU CAN HANDLE IT.

With kids going missing, the town cancels their big fair and puts a curfew in effect. Brothers Killian and Crawford are not happy that they aren't going to be able to party now, so they decide to say to hell with the curfew, and head into the deep part of the forest with some friends to set off some fireworks... because that sounds like a smart & safe idea with someone out there kidnapping kids. Whoever took them probably isn't in the woods. Waiting.

"BEING SCARED IS FOR PEOPLE WHO WANT TO LIVE!"

While lighting off their fireworks (which consists of one bottle rocket and a grand finale, at least as far as we're shown), the brothers discover a Treehouse hidden in the darkness... which they immediately decide to go explore, because again, with someone out there abducting kids, nothing about exploring an ominous shack in the middle of the deep woods at night sounds like it could be a bad idea at all. Inside, they find Elizabeth, terrified, wounded, and going on about how "they're out there" waiting to get her, and them, and probably any other kid that comes along.

MAYBE STAY OUT OF THE WOODS NEXT TIME.

From here on out, it's a battle for survival as the kids sit in the Treehouse wondering what in the hell is going on... which is exactly what we were doing, but in our living room, not a Treehouse.

WELL, THEY SEEM TO HAVE THE HANG OF IT. ZING!

Treehouse does a good job of establishing tension early on, feeling like something that we may have caught on cable in the late 80's or early 90's. It also looks great, and the sharp cinematography helps establish that old school atmosphere that really carries the movie, even through its "less than great" stretches.

The cast is also pretty solid in this one, with the kids all coming off as realistic and likable. Some of the performances were a bit stiff, but for the most part, we them, and we were rooting for them to survive.  

DON'T RUN, JUST STAND THERE AND STARE WHILE THE MANIACS THAT CRUCIFIED AND BURNED THAT PERSON ALIVE ARE COMING FOR YOU.

The problem with Treehouse is that for whatever reason, it just wasn't all that scary or intense. The beginning of the movie built up a good bit of mystery and impending doom fairly well, but after a while it just petered out. Maybe they took too long to reveal who or what was in the woods taking kids and terrorizing the characters, or maybe once it was revealed, it just felt underwhelming.

The more the movie wore on, the less interested we became.

The flashbacks and the burgeoning love story that were supposed to add emotional weight to the movie, didn't. All of the emotional beats felt rushed and disingenuous, and if anything, they took us out of the movie even more. There's just far too much forced, overly-sappy exposition in this one, and not near enough tension or terrifying incident. I mean, it's there, it just wasn't all that effective.

It honestly felt like the first half of the movie was written and directed by one person, and then someone else came in and finished the rest of it off in their own, different way. Which it basically was.

WHY ARE YOU LAYING IN FRONT OF THE DOOR? MOVE!

***BEWARE ENDING SPOILERS*** 

Are we honestly supposed to believe that two kids, both of whom are traumatized, injured, and exhausted, are just going to suddenly turn into some sort of ass-kicking commando duo? I mean it was only a few minutes prior that the girl went into diabetic shock, and now after a bite if chocolate and eating a peach, she's well enough to go hunting a hulking maniac with an automatic rifle?

The shot of them standing there, guns in hand, looking into the woods with that "knowing what they have to do" look on their faces, was just laughable.

SOMEONE DIDN'T JUST PULL THIS ENDING OUT OF THEIR ASS. NOT AT ALL.

The gore in this one is kept to a bare minimum.

No naked stuff either.

Treehouses are evil. Also, re-writes can, and usually do, kill decent movies.

ALSO, DON'T EVER CALL ANYONE "BABY BEAR." IT'S STUPID.

Maybe in more experienced hands Treehouse could have been the intense terrifying movie that it wanted to be, but as it stands, it's little more than an exercise in tedium and missed opportunity.

C-

Treehouse is available now on Cable In-Demand VOD.

Dana Melanie is a starlet on the rise.