Amber Heard and Karl Urban, it sucks that I have to diss their work here, especially since this movie marks Amber Heard's first gig as a Producer.
After seeing this lame-fest though, it might just be her last. *Who am I kidding, this is Hollywood. No it won't.
The story is more than familiar, it's full of the usual cliches and pitfalls, and a bunch of horrible plot devices are really all that drives it forward. Stay with me here...
Two Super Hot American hot chicks who are hot, go biking through the isolated Argentinian Countryside in search of... who knows. They separate from their briefly mentioned "bike tour" for God knows what reason, and rent a room in some small town, for again, some unknown (and I'm sure, ridiculous) reason.
One of them is a smart, responsible girl, and the other is a loud-mouthed slut. The slut (the poor man's Megan Fox, Odette Yustman) says and does some wild things, insults the locals, and shows poor manners... all of which serves to do nothing but invite a bunch of trouble their way. The chaste good girl (Amber Heard) tries to keep her wild friend under control, but fails.
|Then again, she's pretty much an enabler, so...|
Long story short, the two separate, the slut goes missing, and the good girl runs around acting foolish in an effort to find her.
|You couldn't just go for a bike ride in Kansas?|
One of the things that always drives me insane in these types of movies, are the moronic characters that always seem to do the most moronic things at every frigging turn; screaming when they should shut up, antagonizing creepy locals, leaving friends alone in the rapey forest of a foreign country, making no effort to think things through and be smart about their actions... all plot devices, and all equally frustrating.
|That's what you get, dummy!|
|Don't worry, Argentina isn't crying for you.|