DVD Review: The Devil's Tomb (2009)

Cast Members of Note- Cuba Gooding Jr., Ron Perlman, Taryn Manning, Henry Rollins, Ray Winstone, and Valerie Cruz. Nice cast for a straight to DVD Horror flick...

Mack and his crack team of commandos lands a mission that takes then into the bowels of an archaeological dig somewhere in the deserts of the Middle East. Right off the bat he should have known not to trust the CIA, as they're obviously responsible for all of the World's evil-doing, including (but not limited to) deals with The Devil and/or Evil Angels.

Trusting the CIA = face & neck herpes. You've been warned.

Once inside the underground Raccoon City-like bunker, they meet all sorts of interesting characters that are nothing but trouble, including a possessed doctor who quotes bible scripture, a straight-edge priest that riffs on spoken word poetry, and a Dad that wants to kill his daughter. Gunfire and futility ensues.

If Otis Driftwood was a Demon...

I won't spoil what comes next for you here, but suffice it to say that there's really only one place that anyone involved in this mission is headed...

That's right Henry, Heaven. Or maybe Hell. So that's two possible places then.

 

Think Event Horizon, only set in the desert instead of space, and then throw in some Prince of Darkness. Then, take a dash of Ron Perlman, a pinch of Ray Winstone, and add Cuba Gooding Jr., and you have a crazy dark Horror version of Band of Brothers. Kinda.

This was an effective little movie, with a great cast, and an interesting premise; then again, I'm a sucker for the whole "Evil Demon" thing. I'm sure some people will have issues with this movie, but I don't see why... It did its job of entertaining me while not shitting all over the genre, which is all any of us can really ask for these days. I was honestly expecting a Sci-Fi Channel type of an effort here, but was pleasantly surprised to find a decent little flick instead.

The cast was a definite strong point, especially Cuba Gooding Jr.; he does his best Steven Seagal impersonation here as a tough-as-nails Merc, and he actually pulls it off better than Steven Seagal usually does.

Bill Moseley starring in "Prince of Brothers Horizon."

Am I really supposed to buy Taryn Manning as a military doctor? Sure she's cute and all, and I'd love to someday have a love child or two with her, but accepting her as a gun-wielding, bad-ass, camo-wearing mercenary named "Doc" is just too much for me to swallow.

Fun fact: She had sex with Ron Perlman on Sons of Anarchy.

The lesbian scene was pretty messy. As a piggy-minded male, I expect hot girl-on-girl action to be soft, unrealistic, and chauvinistically exploitative; you know, two ridiculously hot girls playing into my sad ideal about what Sapphic love is all about... What I don't expect is for the women to start melting in mid-kiss. Or more than that even, for them to be kissing each others festering boils full of evil pus without really noticing. Thanks for ruining it for me, Jason Connery!

I am so confused by this picture... should I be turned on or repulsed? The answer is both!

All sorts of vomiting, leaky, puss-filled boils, cutting, bleeding, ripping, tearing... this one was surprisingly gory.

Yes! We do get one total Hottie in the all-together, and even some mild lesbian action! I do have to say that the girl-on-girl stuff got pretty gross, but it was still nice to see them at least making an effort.

Don't trust her!

"Stop name-dropping, Mack." or "Let me help you repent!"

Cuba Gooding Jr. kicks ass. Also, you can't really ever hope to defeat an Evil Angel. Never, ever... unless of course you kick ass like Cuba Gooding Jr.

"I will kick your ass."

The Devil's Tomb was pretty entertaining and well made; a hell of a cast, nice atmosphere, liberal amounts of gore and nastiness... an overall good effort by director Jason Connery. Definitely check this one out when it hits DVD on May 26th.

B

The Devil's Tomb is available now on DVD and VOD.

Oh Taryn, why don't you return my calls/tweets/emails/messages that I leave on your porch?