November 9, 2009

Quick Review: Stan Helsing (2009)

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1185266/
A bunch of morons take a Halloween night detour to a town that is besieged by classic Horror killers, where they are forced to do battle with them or somethimg. And of course the name Stan Helsing is a subtle clue that the loser is somehow a monster hunter by birthright...

Screw the plot, I just can't talk about it.

Good parody movies are an extremely rare animal these days. For every Airplane, Spaceballs, or Robin Hood: Men in Tights, we are forced to endure shitty, un-funny alternatives like A Haunted House or Meet the Spartans. Hollywood just can't seem to make a funny parody flick anymore, and what's worse is they don't seem to care to; there are always plenty of dimwits willing to pay to see the unfunny crap, so why even bother to try?

Why?!?
You can tell the filmmakers made Stan Helsing with good intentions, but it's so poorly executed and ridiculous, that we don't care how good the intentions were. The road to Hell is paved with them, you know.

I guess if you like simple-minded, sloppy, painfully un-funny, insultingly bad shit-fest parodies, then you will probably think that Stan Helsing is a real hoot! It's not, but you'll think it is. But it's not.

No. Just, no.
I can give the filmmakers some credit, on some level, for trying to make a fun Horror spoof, but it really wasn't funny at all. I mean, the kid from Good Burger? No. And what a waste of Diora Baird and her awesome assets. Some people will no doubt like this movie, I just won't ever be one of them.

Diora Baird and Desi Lydic are in this.

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