The Digital Dread Report for February 12th

After the sparse offerings of last week, this week does a complete 180 and threatens to empty our wallets completely! (Or at least partially.)

Skyfall and The Man With the Iron Fists are the Must Buy's of the week for us. Neither are Horror flicks, but they are none the less Genre flicks that we need to own. Good times will be had with these two.

Redemption's slew old school releases look pretty tempting too, because who doesn't love 70's and 80's classics on Blu-ray? Communists, that's who.

Silent Hill: Revelation will surely look great on Blu-ray, but it wasn't the best movie. We may pick it up once it hits a lower price. Maybe.

We'll have reviews for Mimesis and Kill For Me coming soon, so maybe they'll end up being good enough to buy, but as for the rest of the week's releases, they're all crap shoots.

And as always, Smiley can suck it. Seriously, Smiley... suck it.

DVD Review: More Brains! A Return to the Living Dead (2011)

This one will be a short one, but it's definitely a sweet one too. 

In 1985, Dan O'Bannon and his misfit cast & crew gave us one of the best and most beloved zombie flicks of all time: The Return of the Living Dead.

There aren't many horror flicks that combine humor and horror as well as ROTLD did, and its quality is why it has remained so popular decades after its release. Also, Tarman. Tarman is a big reason that this movie is so awesome. He's the best zombie that the 80's gave us, and maybe of all time.

I still remember the first time I saw Tarman shamble on screen and gurgle out a wet and terrifying "Brains! More brains!" It was a defining moment for me and my burgeoning Horror Fandom, and remains to this day one of my favorite movie moments of all time.

When I heard that there was an ROTLD documentary out there that had the cast and crew talking about the making of the movie, I knew I had to see it ASAP.

Rated XXX! *Not really, but it makes it all sound cooler.

As far as Movie Docs go, most of them are underwhelming to me. Sure, most of them are neat to watch, but they tend to feel a bit too polished and restrained for my taste. I want to know what really happened on set. I want to know about the issues, the gaffes, the battles and the dysfunction. I want to know the truth of it all. The good and the bad. More Brains delivers all of that, and so much more.

Calista Flockhart was awesome in this movie.

We find out that Director Dan O'Bannon was a bit of a tyrant to work for, and how the set was often times a pretty hellish place to be for cast and crew alike. Starlet Beverly Randolph seems to have been downright scared of the guy, which may explain why she didn't do much acting after ROTLD. We even get to hear stories from a crew member who was fired mid-production. That's the kind of stuff that make behind the scenes documentaries interesting.

Bad girl.

It also goes without saying that anytime you get to sit and listen to Clu Gulager and James Karen talking candidly, it's a good thing; in addition to being funny as hell, Clu Gulager is foul-mouthed and very matter-of-fact with his opinions, and James Karen seems like he's one of the most genuinely sweet people ever. Their segments were our sentimental faves here.

How do you not love this guy?

The extras on this disc are crazy good as well as being crazy plentiful. There's tons of deleted scenes, behind the scenes footage, bloopers, test footage and interviews, including a really great interview with late Director Dan O'Bannon himself. They even give us little retrospectives of ROTLD parts 2 & 3, which just added to the awesomeness of it all. The extras alone make this DVD worth renting/owning.

Name a more iconic zombie character than Tarman. Go ahead, we'll wait.

 

This movie and it's jam-packed-with-cool-extras DVD is an A+ of an experience. If you're a fan of Return of the Living Dead (and its sequels), then seeing it is a no-brainer. Even the more casual fan will have a good time with it, because it's just that interesting. Rent it if you like, but in all honesty it's worth every cent of its $15 price tag, considering the wealth of extras it offers.

Either way, see it and enjoy.

A+

There's nothing quite like the way Hotties looked in the 80's, is there? Linnea Quigley, Jewel Shepard and Beverly Randolph definitely made our childhood a better time. Thanks for the fantasies, ladies.

The Walking Dead returns in 2 days...

 
... and all we have to say on the matter, is this:

The Theatrical Trauma of February 7th

With an insane super-mega death blizzard bearing down on the Northeastern U.S., maybe it's a good thing that this week's Theatrical Releases aren't all that compelling.

Side Effects is the week's only big genre release that interests us, and we'll be skipping that one, mainly because we can't do Channing Tatum. We think it's great that he's all sorts of popular now, and we hope he keeps on making money and finding success, but watching him try to act is just too painful of an experience for us. To us, he's the Male version of Kristen Stewart, only his eyes droop more. It's a shame too, because we're big fans of both Steven Soderbergh and Rooney Mara, but we just can't do it.

Aside from Side Effects, there are a few flicks Limited Release that look fairly promising.

Would You Rather? looks good, and we love Brittany Snow, so we'll check that out for sure if it's playing anywhere near us. Then again it's premiering on VOD too, so, even better.

Spiders 3D looks like a Syfy movie of the week, and we're not really sure how it got a Theatrical Release (Limited or not), so we'll probably skip over that one. Again, this one's premiering on VOD at the same time as it's being released in Theaters, so, VOD is probably the way to go here.

The Sorcerer and the White Snake is a new Jet Li martial arts flick, and what's not to love about a new Jet Li flick? If it's not playing anywhere near you, it's already been on VOD for a few weeks now, so catch it either way.

* Simultaneous Theatrical/VOD releases are the way things are headed for smaller releases, so get used to it. Pretty soon, Netflix will own us all.


So really, it's an uneventful week at the Box Office for Horror and Genre fans alike, so maybe the best bet is to stay just stay home and watch The Weather Channel this weekend... because maybe the Northeast Blizzard will have ice zombies, or Dennis Quaid in it, or something.

Review: The ABCs of Death (2013)

(aka Better Than V/H/S.)
Release Date: On VOD now, In Theaters 2/28.
Country: USA and New Zealand.
Written by: Too many to list.
Directed by: Too many to list.
Starring:  Again, far too many to list.

As the poster above states, The ABCs of Death is made up of 26 different short films, helmed by 26 different Directors. Why tell you that info when the aforementioned poster already has? It just feels disingenuous to assume that every last person will read the small print on a poster, that's why.

Anywho, most of the 26 Directors have a pretty solid resume behind them, and their contributions to this movie are all crazy and wildly different. Even the contributions that suck are pretty unique and creative, so at least there's that.

In fact, so unique were some of the entries, that I was able to tell who directed a few of these without even knowing they were involved in the film to begin with. For example, I knew O for Orgasm was helmed by the same chick that gave us Amer, because of the color schemes and its Giallo feel. Point is, that each Director brought their trademark vision and skill to the table here, and it shows. Not every entry was good, but it still shows.

Since this is a really different type of movie experience, we're going to break it all down with reactions and skip plot elements. Each part that makes up the whole should be seen without being explained beforehand, so we'll just give you a quick impression for each vignette.

These were the standout segments for us. The ones that made the movie worth it. 

A Is for Apocalypse- Pretty good entry from the Director of Timecrimes. I like his style.

It's always good to open  a movie with a crazy bitch brandishing a bloody a knife.

B Is for Bigfoot- I don't know why I liked this one (maybe the naked boobs), but it was simple and fun.

D Is for Dogfight- The absolute best part of the entire movie, Dogfight is a little slice of brilliance. I will buy this movie on Blu-ray the day of its release, just so that I can watch Dogfight in HD, at my leisure. Nice job, Marcel Sarmiento, nice fucking job.

Rex is NOT a happy boy.

I is for Ingrown- We loved We Are What We Are, and Jorge Michel Grau's segment here was every bit as captivating and raw.

L is for Libido- Most definitely the hardest segment for me to watch, but damn if it wasn't effective as hell. It seriously gave me the creeps at one point, because it totally went there.

Yes. That is a jack-off competition. Yeah.

N is for Nuptials- This one was funny, and fun to watch. We've been a fan of Banjong Pisanthanakun since 4bia, and he delivers a lighter, yet enjoyable segment here.

O is for Orgasm- Amer was interesting and had a crazy visual style, and this segment was very, very reminiscent of that. Subtle, yet engrossing.

I'm pretty sure that is her own orgasm raining down on her.

P Is for Pressure- It was fairly disturbing to see how the events of this movie were just no big deal to the protagonist. Pretty effective, and even hauntingly realistic.

R Is for Removed- Nowhere near as disturbing as A Serbian Film (and really, how could it be), this segment from Srdjan Spasojevic was bloody fun none the less.

V is for Vagitus- This one needs to be a full-length feature film, period. Everything about it was fantastic. A lot of work went into this short, and it shows.

This robot will kill a baby, and not even care.

Y Is for Youngbuck- This shit was creepy. Maybe the 2nd best segment of the bunch, Director Jason Eisener now has my attention.*It's interesting to note how the two most effective (IMO) installments in this Anthology both contained no dialogue, only music.

Old Man Rape really likes your hat, kid.

Not all of the segments that we have listed in this section are necessarily "bad," they just either didn't really speak to us, or they flat out annoyed us, quality notwithstanding. For this review, "The Bad" section is more like "The Meh" section.

C is for Cycle- Cycle was alright, but it wasn't much more than a surreal mind-fuck. Not my particular thing.

E is for Exterminate- Kinda cool, but underwhelming. We still love Angela Bettis though.

F is for Fart- WTF is wrong with the Japanese?

What is this I don't even.

J is for Jidai-geki- Again, WTF is wrong with the Japanese?

K is for Klutz- Animated really well, but for us it was just "meh."

Q Is for Quack- Cute, but we wanted more from Swanberg and Co.

T Is for Toilet- Awesome for a fan-submitted short, but Claymation isn't my thing at all.

Clay just can not be scary.

U Is for Unearthed- Neat concept, it just felt a bit hollow. Really clever though.

X Is for XXL- Love Xavier Gens (and how they gave him the letter "X"), but this one was just alright. I expected his segment to stand out more.

Z is for Zetsumetsu- For the last time... WTF is wrong with the Japanese?!? (*For the record, I can't stand the goofy, wacky lengths & places that a lot of Japanese Horror goes to, but that's just me.)

Then again, the Japanese do come up with some cool stuff too.

These are the segments/entries/vignettes/whatever you'd like to call them, that irked us, or pissed me off.

G is for Gravity- Very anticlimactic and vague. Didn't feel very Horror-like at all. 

H is for Hyrdo-Electric Diffusion- I'm sure plenty of peeps will love this one, but it annoyed me so much that I did my best not to watch it at full attention. Goofy shit like this is just not my thing, in any way whatsoever.

Ugh.

M Is for Miscarriage- The fact that THIS is what Ti West contributed to this Anthology, is in and of itself, a miscarriage. He's way better than this ridiculously pathetic and lazy shit.

S is for Speed- I've never been able to buy into, or like, movies that involve tough Suicide Girl wannabes. They almost always put me off immediately, for better or for worse.

W is for WTF?- WTF? is exactly right.

Poor little kitty.

As Anthology films go, The ABCs of Death had more hits than misses, and was a pretty fun experience overall. Some of the segments worked so well, that we wished they had been actual feature length movies, because they left us wanting more. Then again so many segment were so bad or middling, that they made us wish that the Alphabet were shorter.

Either way, The ABCs of Death is a worthwhile watch.

We suggest grabbing some beer and packing your living room with a bunch of friends, ordering this movie on VOD, and having yourselves one hell of a drunken movie night.

B

The ABCs of Death is available now on Blu-ray, DVD, and VOD.

In closing, we leave you with one of our favorite shorts that didn't make the cut, which is  a shame, because it's really good. Sequel, perhaps?