August 17, 2010

FFF- The Tomb (2010)

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1038011/
Some hot chick named Ligeia is running around a College trying to suck souls out of corpses with a tube, and she decides to seduce Wes Bentley and steal him away from his fiance; because he's rich and he can fund her soul sucking.

He falls under her spell, dumps Michael Madsen's daughter, moves to Russia (or some place that looks like Russia) with her, and they sit around in a Castle and drink odd concoctions together, and brood. Ligeia needs a new body you see, because she's cursed and will die without "transferring her essence" to another.

Plot holes galore and awkward body swapping ensue.

Anyone remember after American Beauty when Wes Bentley was the hottest thing in Hollywood, and thought to be on the verge of greatness? Neither do I. If he ever was on that sacred verge, then I honestly think that his eyebrows held him back. I mean, try taking him seriously as an actor with those eyebrows. I mean come on, Wes.

So imagine my surprise to find him starring in The Tomb (aka Ligeia.) I immediately thought to myself "this isn't going to be good", and lo-and-behold, it wasn't.

It's a fine film in a few ways; it looks good, it's filled with some great scenery, there are a couple of hot chicks in it... and that's it. That's pretty much all of the "good." Aside from those few things, The Tomb is drab, dull, boring, slow, often feels choppy, and above all, it isn't scary. As a TV drama, maybe it works for some people. Maybe. As a Horror film, and one released under the Fangoria banner, it's a major let down. Let's not even mention that Ligeia was originally a short story by Edgar Allan Poe, because that makes the insult that much worse. Whoever wrote this script must have wiped their ass with Poe's short story and scoffed, thinking that they could do it better.

There's no build up or logical progression to many of the characters actions, they just seem to kind of do things because the script said to. I'm sure we're supposed to write it all off to Ligeia being so bewitching, but some realism would still be nice. There is no dread or feeling of foreboding to be found here, only poor plotting, poor pacing, and nonsense. I never once felt a sense of concern for anyone on screen, as there was no creepy or dangerous atmosphere anywhere to be found anywhere in this movie.

I'm convinced that The Tomb was edited by someone who was drunk off their ass or wanted some kind of revenge, because the movie jumps scenes so awkwardly and nonsensically, that the plot becomes pointless and frustrating about 20 minutes in. Flat, uninspired acting doesn't help either when dealing with a shitty script, and that's pretty much what we got from just about everyone in this work of art. Wes Bentley pretty much sleepwalks through this movie. Seeing Michael Madsen and Eric Roberts in this movie makes me recall the days when they were both character acting powerhouses, landing plum roles and knocking it out of the park every time. Here, they just kind of exist for the sake of existing, and serve no purpose. Sofya Skya is gorgeous as Ligeia, but really can't act to save her life; Monica Belluci would have been perfect in her role. It's always fun to see long time character actor Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa, as he just has that thing about him... like a Japanese version of Danny Trejo, if that makes any sense. And Christa Campbell was in this? Where? I must have missed her when I dozed off...

Why always with the eyebrows, Wes Bentley?
No tension, no dread, little blood, poor writing, horrible editing, disjointed plot... even the sex scenes fell short, and the movie is about a seductive temptress! This one brings nothing to the table. So far, not so good, Fangoria.
 
Kaitlin Doubleday is in this.

1 comment :

  1. The 1964 version, 'The Tomb of Ligeia' is probably much better, but I'll watch this one for the hot chicks anyway.

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