April 23, 2008

#1 & 2- 28 Days Later and 30 Days of Night

So we have officially kicked off the club with our first night of horror DVD's. Here begin the reviews!

28 Days Later (2002)  
Sub-Genre- Post-Apocalyptic Monkey Zombie Mania!
In Attendance- Me, Eryn, and The Vanilla Gorilla (Nicknames are used to protect the innocent, bear with us folks.)

A bunch of angry monkeys get out of their cages and bite someone, thus beginning the spread of a virus that makes everyone else angry too. Soon enough, everyone in the United Kingdom is pissed off and red-eyed, and the country becomes populated by "Sort of Zombies."

Jim (Cillian Murphy), wakes up from a coma, unaware that all of this has happened, and we see his penis. He sets off in search of Bangers and Mash, but finds only deserted streets and angry "Sort of Zombies" that apparently hate him and would like to smack him in the mouth.

He meets a hot black chick, and vows to take up break dancing. Along the way, they meet up with a few other people, and they all end up finding the army... I'll say no more. I wont ruin the surprise.

An overall effective Horror effort, 28 Days Later makes you feel despair from the word go, and doesn't let up on you until the end. The washed-out look of it all inspires dread, and the music backs the feeling up quite well. Danny Boyle is a good egg.

There are a few great scares to be had here, and the general unease that the movie achieves should keep you creeped out for the entire run time.

Cillian Murphy's penis and ass. Also, for people who are terrified and desperately trying to sneak around and avoid the Infected at any cost, they talked/yelled really loud.

Cillian Murphy's penis and ass
No, Cillian. No!
Never trust angry monkeys. Also, hippies cause more problems than they solve.

 B+ A good buy, or at least a rent. You wont be wasting time with this one, so give it a shot.

Vanilla Gorilla's Raspberry's (5 being the worst)- 2 Raspberries of 5! He didn't hate this one that much!!!

30 Days of Night (2007)
Sub-Genre- Vampires
In Attendance- Me, Eryn, and The Vanilla Gorilla (Nicknames are used to protect the innocent, bear with us folks.)

As the town of Barrow, Alaska, prepares for it's annual 30 days without sunlight, a group of Yiddish Vampires descend upon the town and proceed to make it's residents their bitches.

It's up to the town sheriff (Josh Hartnett) to keep everyone alive, and he does a pretty crap job of it, mainly because those blood suckers are fast, strong, and really not pleasant at all. They also seem to be hungrier than Rosie O'Donnell at a lesbian brunch mixer most of the time. It doesn't help that the chick who recently dumped him tags along the whole time, because she wont let him use his karate skills to help. Women.

So basically they spend the bulk of the 30 days hiding, which really exposes them for the cowards they are. I mean , cant a bunch of chicks, a teenage kid, a 90 year old man and a burly truck driver kill 20 or so immortal vampires?

In the end, only the sheriff can save them, but does he?

Fuck that, Let's wait 30 days until morning.
A fun, bloody and aggressively violent Vampire film, I don't see how this wont please most fans of the genre. The atmosphere is right, and the cinematography is clean and crisp... I loved this one.

I can see how some people may have issues with the Vampires differing a bit from the traditional Vampire mold, but it's not a huge issue. The end was a bit of a "Huh?" moment as well.

I didn't know that vampires spoke Yiddish.

Vampires always ruin threesomes.

B+ 30 Days of Night is a solid entry to the Vampire genre, and it's one of the better Vampire flicks we've seen in a while. A definite own for us.

Vanilla Gorilla's Raspberry's (5 being the worst)- 1 Raspberry of 5! He almost liked it!!!

Melissa George is in this.


  1. I thought 28 Days Later was an absolutely good horror movie, but I tend to favor the sequel, 28 Weeks Later because it had more action. I also felt that 28 Weeks Later didn't receive the credit it deserved just because Cillian Murphy wasn't in it. Now I must admitt that I was a little ticked to learn that he wasn't in it at first, but all was forgiven when I watched the movie. 30 Days of Night I hated. It was a waste of my precious time (Snore!). I would rather watch Cross Roads (EWWW!)then to ever watch that movie again. It was a build up to absolutely nothing.

  2. I Was The Opposite. We Tried To Give Away Our DVD Of Days Later For A Dollar But No One Would Even Buy It. Hated It. 30 Was Fugin Decent Especially Considering The Vampires You Get Next Sparkle In Twilight. This Is How Vampires Should Have Always Been. Vampires Done Right With Likable Characters. Win