31 Days of Millennium Hotties- Danielle Harris

Cute, willing to get naked, sassy, cute, and willing to get naked, Danielle Harris is one of today's truly prolific Horror Hotties. She's the petite, spunky little girl next door that you just can't help but love. You know the one; she borrows smokes from you all the time, makes out with her girlfriends, sleeps with guys who run Horror Blogs... plus, she stars in all kinds of Horror flicks... and is willing to get naked.

So how did it all begin for Danielle Harris?

Well, I'm afraid that it began rather traumatically for her...

We first met her when she played Michael Myer's mentally challenged niece in Halloween 4 & 5. As adorable of a kid as she was, she turned out to be equally as creepy. Determined not to be typecast (at the age of what, 10? lol), she hurriedly left the Horror scene, not to return for over a decade. In all fairness, doing two Halloween flicks could have warped her fragile little mind, so that may have played a part in her decision too.

Why would a little girl not want to do this anymore?

When she found herself starring along side Steven Seagal in one of his shitty movies, she vowed to get herself some better roles. Danielle isn't one to be kept down, and it wasn't long before she was starring in such gems as Don't Touch my Daughter, TV's Growing Pains, and Free Willy... alright, those roles weren't much better...

... but they paid one hell of an allowance!

A bunch of Roseanne's and The Last Boy Scout 's later, she found herself starring in another Horror movie! She played a goth girl in Urban Legend, and one that had the Internets... not everyone had the Internets back in the 90's, you know. She was so avant-garde.

Then guess what happened? She took another 10 year break from Horror movies. *9 years, actually, but close enough.

Remember when everyone had one of those big computing machines?

This time, she returned to the genre with a bang! A naked, naked bang. She starred as Annie in Rob Zombie's Halloween remake, and pretty much rocked it. The whole time she was running from, fighting off, or getting stabbed by Michael Myers, she was naked. What a brave performance.

Hookers.

The floodgates opened for Danielle Harris and her Horror movie career after that, which was something that she had been resisting for more than two decades. Since 2007, she's starred in more that 20 Horror movie and TV projects, and she even directed her first movie, which is of course, a Horror flick.

She started in the genre when she was just a kid, made a solid little career for herself doing mainstream work, and finally said "screw it" and came home to roost. Now, she's a Horror force that can not be stopped! She also grew up hot, which is a big bonus for us.

Now, she kills shit like it ain't no thang.

She's a sexy little powder-keg of Horror Royalty, and she's carrying the torch for us all.... the torch of nakedness and Horror. For that, we must salute her.

Her flicks will be part of many Horror fans movie watching experiences this Halloween and rightly so.

31 Days of Millennium Hotties- Amber Heard

Sure, she's only been in a handful of Horror movies thus far in her career, but have you seen her? She is seriously one of the hottest chicks in Hollywood, and I'm pretty sure that she would do it on the first date too. I mean why wouldn't she? She owes it to the men of the world to dish out as much pleasure as she can before she gets too old and becomes not hot. That's why she was born. So far, she's doing a great job!

Here she is, wiping Johnny Depp off of her mouth after their first date. Told ya.

She started out in a really awful vampire movie called SideFX, but she rebounded nicely with the underground cult hit, All the Boys Love Mandy Lane. In Mandy Lane, she reminded us all just what it meant to be sexy, and she used her boobs to do it.... and her pouty, soft little mouth... and those bedroom eyes...  and a shotgun.

Turns out that Mandy Lane was a teasing little whore! No really, she actually was.

That's what you get for being a tease!

For the next three years she stayed away from Horror, instead taking naughty parts in movie such as Alpha Dog, The Beautiful Ordinary, Never Back Down, Pineapple Express, and The Informers. In these movies, she smoked weed, did coke, drank, had sex, had threesomes, got naked, did karate, got aids, and convincingly acted like she would actually date Seth Rogen.

Amazing work, all of it. Especially the Seth Rogen bit.

We know you were just acting, Amber. Relax,

In 2009 though, she leaped back into the Horror fray playing an undead romantic interest in Zombieland (which was a top-notch flick), and the Jailbait girlfriend of a terrorized kid in The Stepfather (which was a top-notch shit pile.)

In breaking news, she will be playing my Jailbait girlfriend in my own production of Escape From my Bedroom if You Can. I'm just waiting on the chloroform to get here. Just kidding, Amber! (If you get in the van when I tell you, chloroform won't be necessary.)

Ok, so she's less hot here, but what a fun role!

As far as The Ward and And Soon the Darkness go, they were alright movies, but neither really lived up to their potential, especially The Ward; mainly because John Carpenter is capable of much better. Still, Amber shined in both movies, by getting nearly naked and screaming a lot.

Horror-wise, Many Lane is her true crowning achievement, but Drive Angry comes pretty damn close. Drive Angry was an absurd, crazy, awesome Road Revenge movie in which Nic Cage escapes from hell to save his daughter from creepers. Along the way, some crazy shit goes down -like a slow-motion gun fight in the middle of a sex scene- but the best antics come from Amber Heard's character; the girl is sassy and tough in this one, and she wears a pair of short shorts better than anyone else in recent memory.

Happiest. Car Seat. Ever.

I love how she's pressing forward with her career (most of the time in skimpy clothes, mind you), all the while making sure that the Horror genre gets its yearly fix of her hot ass. She may never be a modern day Jamie Lee Curtis, but she still represents Horror well, and looks extremely good while doing it.

"Let's trade bottoms and fart in them! LOL!" *This scene still perplexes me.

 

As long as Amber Heard stays hot and keeps starring in movies that interest us, she should have a long and healthy career. Then again, I guess she could just marry Johnny Depp and live of of his billions, and say screw her career... I'm pretty sure he'd let her have girlfriends on the side.

Either way, Amber Heard is our girl, and will always be a true Horror Hottie.

31 Days of Millennium Hotties- Mmmelissa George!

If you don't like awesome boobs, pouty pillow-lips, hot Australian accents, chicks that like to kiss other chicks, awesome boobs, or Horror flicks, then you wont like Mmmelissa George! (For the record, I like all of those things except for the lesbian bit... that's just too chauvinistic and exploitative towards women.)  

Mmmelissa George started her Horror Hottie career as a slutty mom in the remake of The Amityville Horror, which also starred fellow Horror Hottie Rachel Nichols.  Both of their performances tugged at our loin-strings, though in the end, Mmmelissa wins because she had a sex scene. I still say that they should duke it out in a pool full of lime Jell-O to decide who's hottest though, because that would be fun on so many different levels.

The babysitter is barely through the door and Mmmelissa is already trying to get her naked.

Turistas was her next film, where she played a bikini-wearing slut who drank too much and hooked up with random tourists. This is where she took her career to a new level, donning next to nothing to broaden her scope as an actress. We give kudos to her brave career choices, especially those which involve little-to-no clothing.

They should totally have a threesome before they jump.

In Waz, she played a cop whose ass looked really, really good in a pair of jeans. Sadly, she showed far less skin in this one than in previous efforts, and it was the beginning of a trend for Mmmelissa, as her next film saw her wearing a snowsuit for most of her screen time... and there's nothing sexy about snowsuits.

Couldn't 30 Days of Night have taken place in the desert? Ugh!

With 30 Days of Night, she fully arrived as a true genre hottie. Again, she didn't get naked, but she still looked really hot, and she carried a gun which just does something to us on a primal level. For the record, we're proud of her for letting Josh Hartnett die at the end too, because who needs him?

Triangle was a fun little time-juxtaposing Thriller, which saw multiple instances of Mmmelissa George facing off against one another... not to keep harping, but again there was no nudity from her, and this movie certainly could have benefited from two or three Mmmelissa George's involved in some sort of sinister group shower scene.

Oh, just shoot her already... she's become a prude.

Mmmelissa George is always showing up in one genre project or another, most of them pretty good, and for that we are thankful. She's one of those actresses working today that you can always count on to look hot while fighting to stay alive, and that's not an easy thing to pull off.

If we had to pick one flick of hers that shows off her scrappy survival skills the best, it would have to be A Lonely Place to Die; girlfriend was climbing mountains and shit while trying to dodge bullets and avoid rapey mountain men, and she did it all while looking perfect.

Now that's class.

This bitch is crazy.

This Australian sexpot may have toned down her on screen sluttiness a bit over the past few years (at least when it comes to her genre projects), but she's still doing her thing and entertaining us. I guess we can live with that, especially from one of the genre's best Millennium Hotties.

Still though, please get naked and bloody again soon, alright Mmmelissa?