Showing posts with label Genre- Sexy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Genre- Sexy. Show all posts

March 30, 2016

Blu-ray Review: Cherry Falls (2000)

"An undiscovered gem of the new millennium."

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0175526/
(aka Virgin Killer.)
Release Date: October 20th, 2000.
Country: USA.
Rating: R.
Written by: Ken Selden.
Directed by: Geoffrey Wright.
Starring: Brittany Murphy, Michael Biehn, Jay Mohr, Gabriel Mann, Candy Clark, and a bunch of cameos from future stars.

In 1996, Scream kicked-off a new trend of Teen Terror flicks that spawned movies like The Faculty; I Know What You Did Last Summer; Cry Wolf; Urban Legend; and Final Destination, among many others.

A lot of those movies were alright, but even the good ones felt like sanitized, by-the-numbers showcases for whichever really good looking young actor/actress was hot at the time. Take some good looking kids, have a killer bumping them off in clever ways, and then have some shocking reveal at the end which would set up a sequel. It was the new incarnation of the Slasher flick for the new millennium, and fans ate it up.

Cherry Falls was one of those flicks, and while it never got the chance to earn itself the popularity that many of its contemporaries did, it was certainly amongst the best of them. At least to us it was.

While a teenage couple is making out up at at Inspiration Point, a black-haired figure who kinda looks like Sadako from Ringu (or maybe Joey Ramone) shows up and stabs them to death. The small town of Cherry Falls is naturally shocked to see something so horrible happen to two of their own kids, especially since the killer carved the word Virgin into their corpses; those poor kids died without ever having been laid!

"BUT MAYBE A KISS BEFORE YOU GO..."
After another girl is killed in the same way the next night, sweet, virginal Jody begins to wonder if she should just have sex so that she doesn't meet the same grisly fate. Her boyfriend is all about it (because he's a dick), but her dad (who is also the Sheriff investigating the murders) thinks that it's an awful idea; she's his little buttercup after all, and he's the only man that she should ever have feelings for. I know that sounds kinda creepy, but the way that they act towards each other sometimes...

DUDE, GET OFF OF HER!
Being the daughter of the Sheriff at least has its perks, like learning how to defend yourself, which comes in handy when Jody is able to fight off the killer every time they come after her, which ends up being about 12. Why is the killer focusing on Jody like that? Probably because the meddling girl is trying to figure out who's killing her friends, and in doing so uncovers some long-buried secrets that are motivating them to kill... which the killer wants exposed anyway... but that they kinda don't want exposed, because then she can't keep killing. It's complicated.

NOT IN THE BUTT SHE'S NOT.
As more and more teenagers are murdered, all the other kids decide to get together and have a massive orgy at some old abandoned house, so as not to be virgins anymore, and escape the wrath of the killer. Sounds rational to us.

Heavily-edited murder and sex ensues. 

THAT'S ONE ROUGH ORGY.
As the Teen Terror/Slasher flicks of the late 90's/early 2000's go, Cherry Falls was one that got passed over by most people. That's mainly because the MPAA wanted it cut to shit, which took it from being a theatrical film to one that was heavily trimmed and dumped on Cable TV. That's where we first saw it, and even though it was obviously cut for content, we still got a pretty big kick out of it.

Like many of its fellow Teen Terror flicks of the time, Cherry Falls utilizes pretty people, humor, and plenty of stalk-and-kill mechanics to tell its story, but it's really the way that it shakes all of those conventions up that makes it stand out. Usually, having sex in a Slasher flick means that you're fated to die; here though, having sex will actually keep you alive. I really would have like to have seen that concept brought to life in a totally unedited way as the director intended. It's still pretty cool as is though.

BRITTANY MURPHY GONNA HAVE TO SLAP A BITCH?
The thing that we love the most about Cherry Falls (aside from Brittany Murphy), is its killer; avoiding anything that would spoiler the killer's identity (not that it's very hard to figure out to begin with), we'll just say that when they were on the hunt or killing, they were ferocious. The person who played them did a hell of a job coming off as being truly disturbed.

As for the lovely, gone-too-soon Brittany Murphy, her performance here showcased everything that we loved about her, and that made her such a special talent: She's adorable, and sexy in an offbeat way, but her greatest quality is how she manages to come off as awkwardly sweet and believable in such a natural way. She starred in many great movies over the span of her career, but Cherry Falls will always be one of our sentimental faves of hers.

WHAT A HELL OF A FINAL GIRL SHE MADE.
The fact that the MPAA forced this movie to cut and alter so much of its content, really pisses us off. Even with this new Scream Factory Blu-ray release, the film still remains cut to hell, which means that somewhere out there is a bloodier, nastier, more tawdry version of the movie that we'll probably never get to see.

It's fine as is, but it could have been so much better had the kills been shown, and had the producers not had to cut the movie's racier elements to please the asshole MPAA. Man, what could have been...

THAT'S PRETTY MUCH HOW WE FEEL ABOUT THE MPAA.
Given that she died so young, and under such mysterious circumstances, it bums us out to watch anything with Brittany Murphy in it anymore. She was beautiful and talented, and she always came across as so genuinely sweet on film, that trying to enjoy her work while knowing what would eventually happen to her just smarts.

WE MISS YOU, GIRL.
There's all kinds of bloody kills in this one, but most of them happen off-screen, so none of it ends up being too crazy. The part where the killer was slashing everyone a the party was cool though. It's really too bad that so much of this movie was cut to hell.

OH HEY, THE MPAA FORGOT TO CUT SOMETHING!
There's actually a High Schooler orgy in this movie, but it contains no nudity. There is some brief nudity in an autopsy scene though. Again, what a shame.

THAT'S ABOUT AS NAKED AS THIS MOVIE GETS.
Scream Factory's release of Cherry Falls looks and sounds great, considering the fact that the print they had to work with wasn't the best, and that Universal probably didn't care enough to have them do a really pristine job on the transfer. That sounds like a condemnation, but it's not; Scream Factory has made Cherry Falls look as good as it ever has, and the fact that it could look better is not their fault.

The only problem I really have with this disc is the fact that it isn't the Director's Cut. Again, it's not Scream Factory's fault, as they tried to get their hands on the uncut material from the film, but the fact that whoever owns it won't give it up to allow it to be restored really sucks. It's a huge (and pointless) wasted opportunity.

We really dug the commentary track with director Geoffrey Wright, where he talks about the film (obviously), but specifically about its troubles with the MPAA, and the untimely passing of its star, Brittany Murphy.

Special Features:

  • Audio Commentary with director Geoffrey Wright.
  • Lose it or Die: The Untold Story of Cherry Falls- interviews with writer and Co-Executive Producer Ken Selden and producer Marshall Persinger.
  • Cherry Falls Deputy Mina – an interview with Amanda Anka.
  • Vintage Interviews with Brittany Murphy, Michael Biehn, Jay Mohr and director Geoffrey Wright.
  • Behind-the-Scenes footage.
  • Original Script.
  • Theatrical Trailer.

THE "FALLS" IN CHERRY FALLS ACTUALLY TASTE LIKE CHERRY. TRUE STORY.
One of our favorite underrated gems of the new millennium, Cherry Falls is a Slasher flick that delivers the goods, even if it isn't a perfect movie. Most of the credit for its appeal comes from the presence of Brittany Murphy, but it's a fun film that stands out from the pack in other ways too, and is one that we'll always have a sweet spot for.

If you have yet to discover this one, now is the time to give it a go.

B+

Cherry Falls is available now on Blu-ray.

http://amzn.to/1MKQfMm

Plenty of beautiful ladies inhabit Cherry Falls, chief amongst them, the immortal Brittany Murphy.

June 20, 2011

Quick Review: 5ive Girls (2006)

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0494199/
Why is this movie a Guilty Pleasure? Well, mainly because its best features are 7 hot chicks in Catholic Schoolgirl outfits, lots of boobs, lots of side-boob, lesbian ass-massaging, a lesbian pat-down/cavity search, lesbian kissing, girl-on-girl paddling, a horrible CGI Demon, and Ron Perlman... this movie just drips guilt and pleasure.

Imagine a soft-core Cinemax style porn (minus pretty much all of the porn) that existed only to parade a bunch of young, hot girls in schoolgirl outfits around on screen for 90 minutes. Then add some supernatural shit to it. That's pretty much 5ive Girls in a nutshell.

It's really one of those harmless, middle-of-the-road Horror flicks that is geared towards the younger crowd. It delivers on some of the goods that Horror fans come to expect, but it never really pushes too hard on the walls of good taste, which is a shame. This could have been one hell of an exploitation flick.

So shameless.
The classic "ass healing" scene is a perfect example. How many movies do you recall where hot teen girls give each other healing ass rubs?
5ive Girls is the story of... well, 5 girls. 5 bad, naughty, juvenile delinquent, hot girls, that are sent to some defunct old school for some "discipline." It's nice to see that the creepy headmaster in this movie is a chick for a change, as I was totally expecting Ron Perlman to be the rapey-perv doling out the spankings and doing the anal cavity searches. Seriously, there was an anal cavity search during the lesbian pat-down scene. Seriously there was a lesbian pat-down scene.

How is this even legal, let alone ethical?
There's contraband in her butt, and the sexy warden Will find it!
So anyways, the 5 bad girls each have special "gifts," which include telekinesis, healing, second sight and being slutty. Father Drake (Ron Perlman) pretty much plays the same part as he always does, which is the gritty and intimidating Serial Killer-looking guy (only this time he's in Priest form), is there to help them along and make them say prayers, while the evil, whorish Headmistress paddles them, berates them, and sets them all up to die at the hands of a vengeful Demon.

The vengeful Demon.
The awkward kiss.
And drugs!
There's a point to it all, but who cares really. It's all fluff, and the only reason it's worth watching is because it's full of hot chicks. I guess if you liked The Craft or any other "safe" Tween Horror movie like that, you may like this one too.

These girls do need discipline!
Much like the sassy pop stylings of 80's super-group Wham!, 5ive Girls is a Guilty Pleasure that brings us equal amounts of enjoyment and shame. Sure, you can laugh at George Michael's hair, or the fact that he just can't resist blowing random guys in filthy rest stop bathrooms, but I dare you to listen to Wake Me Up (Before You Go-Go) and not sing along. You can't. It isn't humanly possible.

On the same token, you can't really watch 5ive Girls without digging it on some perverse, shameful level. Sure, much like the music of Wham!, it mostly sucks, but while sucking, it manages to make you tingle in your pants and want to break out in a spontaneous dance routine... Ok, whatever. We're just ashamed that we kinda like them both.

P.S. I'd also like to say that despite marrying the hot chick from Bananarama, there's no way that Andrew Ridgely (the other Wham!) didn't fight George Michael's penis with his mouth at some point during their career. I guess what I'm saying is that they had their own "Bananarama" going on. Just watch the videos man... the proof is in the pudding. The man pudding.

 
Some more of Ron Perlman and his naughty bitches, because how is that a bad thing?