VOD Review: Tales of Halloween (2015)

Tales of Halloween is an Anthology that features 10 stories, all of which take place on Halloween. They are tired together in small, fun ways (mostly characters showing up in the background of different segments), but are all pretty much stand-alone stories.

Each segment is directed by a different, notable Horror director, and they feature cameos by Genre stars new and old. They even have Adrienne Barbeau narrating some of them.

Here's a short but sweet breakdown on all 10 segments:

SWEET TOOTH

Sweet Tooth is a boogeyman of local Urban Legend who kills those who have eaten all of their Halloween candy, without leaving any for him as an offering... as young Mikey and his babysitters are about to find out.

This one felt more humorous than it did scary, but it did offer up some pretty great gore gags. Not our favorite, but decent enough. Caroline Williams is still looking good.

Directed by: Dave Parker (The Hills Run Red)
Be on the lookout for: Greg Grunberg, Caroline Williams.

THE NIGHT BILLY RAISED HELL

When Billy eggs old Mr. Abbadon's house on a dare, the mysterious man takes him on a tour of the neighborhood, showing him what Halloween is really all about.

Easily the worst of the bunch.

The slapstick vibe of this story irked the hell out of us, and the cartoon soundbites that were used every time someone fell or was hurt made it even worse. Not our thing at all. Natalie Castillo is crazy hot in this one though.

Directed by: Darren Lynn Bousman (Saw II, III & IV)
Be on the lookout for: Barry Bostwick, Adrienne Curry.

TRICK

Two couples are enjoying their Halloween night by watching scary movies, when a group of murderous trick or treaters shows up with murderous intent.

Easily our favorite of the bunch.

This one was all kinds of disturbing, murderous fun, and the twist at the end was awesome. Loved it.

Directed by: Adam Gierasch (Night of the Demons)
Be on the lookout for: Tiffany Shepis.

THE WEAK AND THE WICKED

A gang of killers is confronted by the man who they terrorized when they were children.

Another solid entry, this one felt like a modern day revenge Western, which made it stand out a bit. Grace Phipps killed it as the evil little bitch who lead the murderous gang of thugs, and the ending was quite fitting.

Directed by: Paul Solet (Grace)
Be on the lookout for: Grace Phipps, Kier Gilchrist, Booboo Stewart.

GRIMM GRINNING GHOST

When Lynn's car breaks down after attending a Halloween Party, she is followed home by a ghost who is out for revenge.

This one was probably our 2nd favorite segment, as it had a truly creepy vibe going for it, and featured a hell of a cast. The ending was a bit lame and predictable, although it still made us jump. Barbara Crampton and Lisa Marie were looking GOOD in this one, and Alex Essoe is a star on the rise.

Directed by: Axelle Carolyn (Soulmate)
Be on the lookout for: Alex Essoe, Lin Shaye, Barbara Crampton, Stuart Gordon, Mick Garris, Lisa Marie.

DING DONG

Jack and Bobbie love Halloween, even if Bobbie's unnatural love for children threatens to spoil the whole thing...

We love the hell out of Lucky McKee, but his TOH entry was too quirky and odd for our tastes. Had he played it straight with this one, it might have been the best of the bunch. Still fun though.

Directed by: Lucky McKee (The Woman, All Cheerleaders Die)
Be on the lookout for: Pollyanna McIntosh.

THIS MEANS WAR

Rival neighbors compete to see who can set up the best Halloween display.

Another letdown, this entry did nothing for us. Nice bloody ending though.

Directed by: Andrew Kasch (Never Sleep Again) and John Skipp.
Be on the lookout for: Dana Gould, James Duval, Elissa Dowling.

FRIDAY THE 31ST

A woman is chased by a Jason-like killer, and is forced to take refuge in cabin and fight for her life.

This was a pretty fun segment, and we loved the hell out the the way that they made Dorothy look with the glowing eyes and all. The little claymation guy was pretty cute too.

Directed by: Mike Mendez (Big Ass Spider!)
Be on the lookout for: Nick Principe.

THE RANSOM OF RUSTY REX

Two men get more than they bargained for when the kidnap the son of a wealthy man, looking for a big 
payday.

Not a bad entry, but like so many others in this movie, it felt too silly to be very effective.

Directed by: Ryan Schifrin (Abominable)
Be on the lookout for: John Landis, Sam Witwer, Jose Pablo Cantillo.

BAD SEED

A great entry that suffered from being over to quick, Bad Seed at least tried to tie things together in an interesting way. This segment really needed another 10 minutes to allow it to breathe and finish off strong though, and it might have been the best of the bunch if they had given it that extra time. *The husband at the beginning is played by Wolf Creek director Greg McClean. We just thought that was really cool.

Directed by: Neil Marshall (The Descent)
Be on the lookout for: Kristina Klebe, Pat Healy, Joe Dante, John Savage, Cerina Vincent, Adam Green, Greg McClean.

If the stories in this Anthology had taken a more serious direction, and lost some of the wacky humor that they employed, we would have liked it a lot more. As it stands though, this was a pretty enjoyable effort.

We really liked the cameos, especially the ones that involved behind-the-camera talent like Joe Dante, Stuart Gordon, John Landis, and Greg McClean. You also can't have a good Horror movie without beautiful women (I'm generalizing, of course), and so seeing Barbara Crampton, Lisa Marie, Caroline Williams and the like was fantastic. The new generation of Horror Hotties featured in this one was pretty great too.

AND A BLOODY GOOD TIME WAS HAD BY ALL...

Overall, Tales of Halloween was a pretty solid Horror Anthology that did a great job at capturing the creepy, cold October atmosphere. It's an uneven effort, which may just be a personal taste thing for us, but it's also a mostly satisfying one.

If it sounds like it's your thing, then give it a rent, because it probably is.

B-/C+ ...depending on how you look at it.

Tales of Halloween is available now on VOD.

Ah, the Ladies of Tales of Halloween. There are so many of them, that they got their own Horror Hottie post, which you can check out right HERE.

VOD Review: All Hallows' Eve 2 (2015)

The thing that you need to know about All Hallows' Eve 2, is that it's not really a genuine sequel to 2013's All Hallows' Eve (review HERE), and it's not even a "traditional" movie at all.

What this "movie" really is, is a gathering of 8 previously released Horror Shorts, with a wraparound story that loosely ties them together.

As non-traditional as it may be, All Hallows' Eve 2 is a far more enjoyable watch than its predecessor was. At least they didn't bring back Mr. Jingles, or whatever the fuck that stupid clown's name from the first one was.

Here are the shorts, listed from best to worst. We're going to keep things short and sweet, so as not to spoil too much.

DESCENT (2004)

"A woman is trapped in an elevator with the man she witnessed murder her best friend."

This is the best of the bunch. The first half of this one was pretty intense, and it sucked us in from the get-go. The twist at the end was pretty cool too.

JACK ATTACK (2013)

"Jack's favorite babysitter Elizabeth introduces him to the art of pumpkin carving on Halloween night. Nothing will ever be the same."

Jack Attack gave us a twist that we did not anticipate, and it was a wickedly fun entry.

ALEXIA (2013)

"Although Alexia, Franco's ex-girlfriend, has been deceased for some time, Franco still has her as a contact on his social network. When he decides to delete her and move on, something strange starts to manifest through his computer."

This Argentinian Short was pretty solid. We'd definitely watch a longer version of this one.

MR. TRICKER'S TREAT (2011)

"Every October, Mr. Tricker has the best Halloween decorations in town. While setting up his annual display, a quirky neighbor gets too close to figuring out why his decor is so lifelike."

This one is probably the most disturbing Short, as right from the start, we knew we were in for something nasty. It had a good sense of black humor about it too.

THE LAST HALLOWEEN (2013)

"Four young trick-or-treaters set out on a door-to-door adventure - making their way from house to house, collecting strange treats as they go - that could very well end up being... the Last Halloween!"

There's nothing wrong with this Short, but it just didn't do anything for us. I'm honestly not sure why. The costumes were great.

THE OFFERING (2013)

"A father and son travel deep into the woods to make an offering to a mysterious force. When they realize a key element is missing, they must improvise before time runs out."

Short, to the point, and pretty good, even if it was really predictable.

THE WRAPAROUND

"A woman finds a VHS tape on her doorstep that shows a series of gruesome tales that could be real. But the true danger is the pumpkin-faced killer that's using the tape to find his next victim."

The synopsis above is for the entire All Hallows' Eve 2 movie, so maybe that's the title of this Short, but who knows. This was a pretty creepy entry, but it didn't really seem to work as a wraparound. It really exists only to allow the other Shorts to be viewed, which is fine, but (assuming) seeing as this was the only part of the movie that the producers actually had to create for themselves, couldn't they have put some more into it? "Watch this VHS tape, and then I'll kill you?" Does anyone even have a VCR ready to go like that anymore?

They also could have expanded this one a bit at the end.

A BOY'S LIFE (2011)

"Through his father's military absence, a withdrawn and imaginative boy attempts to prove to his coping mother that the monster beneath his bed is real."

Decent story, decent acting, but it was not scary at all. Meh.

M IS FOR MASOCHIST (2013)

"Three young men find themselves in a sidestreet carnival. Here, a man is pinned to the board and they have every weapon imaginable at their disposal. Now, they must make the man bleed, at the bequest of a strange carnie."

At only 3-minutes (or so) long, this one didn't get a chance to do much. Interesting concept, but it felt more like a commercial than it did a Short Film. Blah.

LOOKING UP AT EACH ENTRY, SKELLY SKELETON AGREES WITH OUR ASSESSMENTS.

We actually really like the idea of someone gathering a bunch of Horror Shorts together, and releasing them as one movie; there are a lot of great Shorts out there, most of which never see the light of day. Some of the Shorts in this movie are selling for $12.99 on Amazon, which is ridiculous. Who would pay that much to watch one 10-minute Short Film? Honestly?

So kudos for the producers of this one for bringing a bunch of them together under one banner, and offering people a chance to see them for one much lower price.

All Hallows' Eve 2 isn't a bad effort overall, but it is like most Horror Anthologies in that some of it is good, some of it is bad, and some of it just should have been cut out completely. We're glad we watched it, as we loved Descent, Jack Attack, and Alexia, but everything else felt a bit like filler. Maybe it wasn't all "bad" filler, but it was filler, nonetheless.

YOU KNEW THIS WAS COMING, RIGHT?

This is not a "great" Horror Anthology, but it is a decent one in places. It is great though, how someone brought a bunch of random, pre-existing Horror Shorts together and released them in one movie for people to see, so we do have to give the overall "movie" some props.

If you're a fan of short-form fiction, then All Hallows' Eve 2 might be for you. In our opinion, it's worth seeing for Descent alone. Just know that this is strictly middle-of-the-road fare.

C

All Hallows' Eve 2 is available now on VOD.

Here are some of the lovely ladies of All Hallows' Eve 2.

VOD Review: A Christmas Horror Story (2015)

It doesn't matter whether you've been naughty or nice, because A Christmas Horror Story is one holiday-themed Anthology that will give you both presents and coal at the same time.

Ever since the success of Trick 'r Treat, Horror filmmakers have been trying their damnedest to come up with their own equally compelling Horror Anthologies, most of which haven't even come close to measuring up to the lofty bar set by Mike Dougherty's modern day classic. Quality Anthologies just aren't that easy to pull off, and neither are Christmas-themed Horror movies. For every Black Christmas, we get a Santa Claws or Santa's Slay to put up with.

A Christmas Horror Story is stuck somewhere in between those extremes.

It's interesting to us that the creator of the superb Horror Anthology, Trick 'r Treat, will be releasing his own full-length Krampus movies in theaters this December. Somehow, we think he'll end up getting it just right.

A Christmas Horror Story is broken down into three main storylines which are told concurrently, and accented by a wraparound involving a pending battle between Santa Claus and Krampus. They're also all kind of related to each other, but not to the extent that it alters the plot.

Story 1- Three teens sneak into their school on Christmas Eve to do some investigative reporting on the grisly murders that happened there a year prior. Now, why they would do that is beyond me, because they cant show anyone the footage, as they're not supposed to be there to begin with, but I digress. They sneak into the locked basement where the murders happen, and begin to search around for clues or whatever, and end up getting locked in.... but not alone! This chapter started off strong enough, but by the end, it kind of felt like a typical episode of Goosebumps or something similar.

HE'S NOT EVEN BEING SUBTLE ABOUT BREAKING THE 4TH WALL, IS HE?

Story 2- On a trip to visit their rich aunt, a family of four unwittingly unleashed the vengeful evil of Krampus, who decides that they all need to die. Being that the entire family are complete assholes (save the daughter, who looked like she was embarrassed to be related to any of them), we're siding with Krampus on this one. This is probably the strongest of the three main stories.

SHE REALLY HATES HER FAMILY.

Story 3- The weakest story of the lot involves a Cop who takes his family out into the country to get themselves a Christmas Tree. Of course he illegally trespasses on someones land and steals the tree, which kinda makes him a corrupt Cop, but that's neither here nor there. While stealing the tree, their young son disappears, and when he returns he's not exactly who he seems to be... which basically means death for them all. This one was alright, but it just felt kind of flat throughout.

JUST LEAVE HIS ASS IN THE WOODS.

The Wraparound- The wrap is probably the coolest part of the movie. It involves Santa Claus getting ready to deliver his toys on Christmas Eve, when all of his Elves start turning into bloodthirsty zombies, which forces old Saint Nick to dispatch them in a myriad of bloody ways. When he finds out that its Krampus who is behind the mischief, the stage is set for a battle for the ages... and a really cool ending.

ZOMBIE ELF.

A Christmas Horror Story is an anthology that plays and feels like a Tales From the Crypt movie; it's funny in parts; the stories are all enjoyable, even if they're also predictable; and the ending has a fun little twist that feels wicked in a campy sort of way. It's also got its own version of the Crypt Keeper, in Dangerous Dan; the drunk radio DJ played perfectly by Williams Shatner, who provides much of the movies levity. We really loved the bits with William Shatner, and we honestly can't believe that he's in his mid-80's. The guy is pretty damn spry for being that old, and he honestly doesn't look a day over 60.

We also really liked the twist at the end, which we thought was pretty damn clever.

LIVE LONG AND PROSPER, WILLIAM SHATNER.

On the negative side of things, this is a pedestrian, average effort for the most part. Now that's not necessarily a bad thing, as plenty of average Horror flicks end up being enjoyable, but this one just felt really generic at times. It was like they could have made it into something great, but just didn't have the tools to do so. As is usually the case, stronger writing would have helped.

Had the movie played out in true Anthology form -as in showing each story unfold, one at a time, while being accented by the wraparound- we think it would have resonated better with us. Going back and forth and back and forth between three separate stories and a wrap-around not only felt clumsy, but it lessened the impact of those stories.

We're also not sure why they didn't release this one closer to Christmas rather than Halloween, as it has a great wintry, yuletide vibe going for it throughout. 

SANTA AIN'T HAVING IT.

A Christmas Horror Story is a Horror Anthology that provides a decent amount of entertainment, despite its bland flaws. It would probably be better to watch this one a bit closer to Christmas, for obvious reasons, but if you feel compelled to make it a part of your October Horror Repertoire, then it's probably worth giving it a rent.

It's not bad, but it's not great either. 

C

A Christmas Horror Story is available now on VOD.

The ladies of A Christmas Horror Story.