January 18, 2011
Attention sheeple: a new image from Breaking Dawn has just hit the internets!
Here's a newsflash for those of you out there who have your bar for quality control set low enough to be Twilight fans: This picture makes no sense, because he's dead, which means there's no beating heart pumping blood throughout his body, which means no blood flow to his glittering penis, which means he can't get an erection, make love, and most assuredly can not get someone pregnant.
If you don't buy into all of this crazy science business, by all means bury your heads back in the fucking sand, and continue to take it in the ass from this terrible series (and I mean both in the literary and cinematic formats.)
Oh and don't forget to set your dvr's for The Bachelor, as that represents true love fairly well too.